Psychic Addiction, can anyone help? Been in a bad place, feeling low, wanted reassurance!

It is a good, beneficial direction to do as you are suggesting, i.e. to trust your own thoughts/feelings. Addictive phonecalls to psychics would undermine having faith in yourself. You seem very keen to be in a relationship but I question why do you need to have a relationship with someone if you are so unsure? You don't say when you finished your last relationship but, if it was recently, then you might be reacting in a rebound situation fashion.

I am sceptical of psychics who charge a lot. You must realise that they could well be telling you just what you want to hear and/or it is a cliche that they tend to say someone is coming into your life, i.e. keep you dangling/give you hope. Presumably they are clairvoyant then? Clairvoyants purportedly can see into the future, i.e. not just someone who calls themselves psychic.

If you have just recently ended the relationship, this could be a good time to reinforce faith in yourself, e.g. doing things that stretch you a little (that you would enjoy) that can boost your confidence. Why not explore your own space and empower yourself?

Lilac jewel. You have answered your own question.
You say you have been thinking about your answers within you.

Now, it is quite normal to seek someone who can guide you.....but it comes at a price. The up side is it is entertaining, fun, gratifying to hear someone talk about you and your situation....and the last part is the addictive part, simply because I am the centre of a conversation, exclusively about me, my life, my inner and outer world- even if I have to pay to hear them say all that...

I have been to many many astrologers, psychics when I was young, but in a very jack-the-lad energy, killing time, entertainment value, nothing else to do, let's go and get our future read! Not to get insights but to pass time and fascination for occult things. But it is quite another thing, when you take your confusions and inner answers. These things actually add to the confusion.
One says this, another says that,...what to do, who to believe. Then part of you wants to believe this, yet another part fights that....just because a psychic said so...

I say, no one can tell you if you love this person or not....only you can. But you have lost clarity not gained it by consulting soothsayers too frequently.
Soothe Sayers....to smooth your heart, but here they have not soothed your heart, but unsettled you. The predictions can start of a mirage....which may never materialize or it would, but you are too tense and sit in your own way to receive blessings
Stop. Stop seeking your answers from these people. Most of them don't have clue of their own life and future, let alone of someone else's future. Got to put the respect that you have for psychics, under some scrutiny in order to get over this addiction.

Do sit and let your thoughts and mind settle. Give yourself time....don't rush to decisions. Let your heart settle.breathe, breathe nicely, no pressure, no rush, just relax. Give yourself time to clear your head of all the differnt voices that echo in your head
When you are settled, your heart will know plain as day, what way life wants you to go

You already have your own answers. when you can rest, they make themselves known
Love

It is a good, beneficial direction to do as you are suggesting, i.e. to trust your own thoughts/feelings. Addictive phonecalls to psychics would undermine having faith in yourself. You seem very keen to be in a relationship but I question why do you need to have a relationship with someone if you are so unsure? You don't say when you finished your last relationship but, if it was recently, then you might be reacting in a rebound situation fashion.

I am sceptical of psychics who charge a lot. You must realise that they could well be telling you just what you want to hear and/or it is a cliche that they tend to say someone is coming into your life, i.e. keep you dangling/give you hope. Presumably they are clairvoyant then? Clairvoyants purportedly can see into the future, i.e. not just someone who calls themselves psychic.

If you have just recently ended the relationship, this could be a good time to reinforce faith in yourself, e.g. doing things that stretch you a little (that you would enjoy) that can boost your confidence. Why not explore your own space and empower yourself?

Thanks so much Amy for your reply. Yeah I've ended the relationship a few weeks ago and I know I'm unsure 🙁 I do have feelings for him in a way, he's a good man with so many good qualities but not sure I'm 'in love' with him!

I have been addicted years ago as well and yes so many of them just gave me false hope as alot of things they said away back then never happened, I do understand we've free will so our paths can change. I just seem to phone them when I'm having problems and this has started again and I'm determined to try and find my own answers and trust myself.

Just that little part of me says oh but what if I am settling for second best and maybe there's a better connection for me as she told me.

Thanks so much Amy for your reply. Yeah I've ended the relationship a few weeks ago and I know I'm unsure 🙁 I do have feelings for him in a way, he's a good man with so many good qualities but not sure I'm 'in love' with him!

I have been addicted years ago as well and yes so many of them just gave me false hope as alot of things they said away back then never happened, I do understand we've free will so our paths can change. I just seem to phone them when I'm having problems and this has started again and I'm determined to try and find my own answers and trust myself.

Just that little part of me says oh but what if I am settling for second best and maybe there's a better connection for me as she told me.

You have already seen through their advice when you say they gave you false hope so you have not lost your common sense radar!

Do you access your intuition? When I can't decide on 2 options I just wait until I get clarity (if the situation allows for this). Sooner or later, things fall into place and the way forward becomes clear.

Lilac jewel. You have answered your own question.
You say you have been thinking about your answers within you.

Now, it is quite normal to seek someone who can guide you.....but it comes at a price. The up side is it is entertaining, fun, gratifying to hear someone talk about you and your situation....and the last part is the addictive part, simply because I am the centre of a conversation, exclusively about me, my life, my inner and outer world- even if I have to pay to hear them say all that...

I have been to many many astrologers, psychics when I was young, but in a very jack-the-lad energy, killing time, entertainment value, nothing else to do, let's go and get our future read! Not to get insights but to pass time and fascination for occult things. But it is quite another thing, when you take your confusions and inner answers. These things actually add to the confusion.
One says this, another says that,...what to do, who to believe. Then part of you wants to believe this, yet another part fights that....just because a psychic said so...

I say, no one can tell you if you love this person or not....only you can. But you have lost clarity not gained it by consulting soothsayers too frequently.
Soothe Sayers....to smooth your heart, but here they have not soothed your heart, but unsettled you. The predictions can start of a mirage....which may never materialize or it would, but you are too tense and sit in your own way to receive blessings
Stop. Stop seeking your answers from these people. Most of them don't have clue of their own life and future, let alone of someone else's future. Got to put the respect that you have for psychics, under some scrutiny in order to get over this addiction.

Do sit and let your thoughts and mind settle. Give yourself time....don't rush to decisions. Let your heart settle.breathe, breathe nicely, no pressure, no rush, just relax. Give yourself time to clear your head of all the differnt voices that echo in your head
When you are settled, your heart will know plain as day, what way life wants you to go

You already have your own answers. when you can rest, they make themselves known
Love

Thanks so much jnani for your reply. That's so true as thats the way I'm feeling ie. these things actually add to the confusion, one says this, another says that and who do you believe! Also very true when you said they have not soothed my heart, but unsettled me.

I know I need to stop seeking answers from them and start trusting myself. Yes I really do need to settle my thoughts and mind and struggling abit but hopefully will get there. My mind seems to be full of so much confusion and goes from one thought to another!

As I said to Amy just that little part of me says oh but what if I am settling for second best and maybe there's a better connection for me as that psychic told me?

Going to give myself time to settle my mind (if I can) might try and meditate as I need to settle my heart and mind of the confusion I'm feeling.

Lilac I worked for a short time on a psychic phone line. Some of them will be genuine - but the chances are the company encourage them to keep clients on the line for a long time........its one reason why I stopped. It was unethical IMO. So don't go to a phone line psychic. Don;t go to ANY psychic about this in fact.

You KNOW you need to trust your own intuition.......it was very often what I would tell people if they had a reading from me. You see we are ALL psychic but too many people blunt their abilities, or doubt them. Why do you need anyone to tell you what you already know? You KNOW you have made the right decision about the relationship. There may well be someone in your future that you can have a good relationship with but I will tell you now the most important relationship you will ever have is with yourself. Until you love yourself you can never have a truly loving open relationship with anyone.

So take some time, learn to love yourself, and Mr Right may well come along......

You have already seen through their advice when you say they gave you false hope so you have not lost your common sense radar!

Do you access your intuition? When I can't decide on 2 options I just wait until I get clarity (if the situation allows for this). Sooner or later, things fall into place and the way forward becomes clear.

Maybe I'm not answering this right but do you mean just to follow your gut feeling?

You have already seen through their advice when you say they gave you false hope so you have not lost your common sense radar!

Do you access your intuition? When I can't decide on 2 options I just wait until I get clarity (if the situation allows for this). Sooner or later, things fall into place and the way forward becomes clear.

Sorry if I'm not giving the right reply Amy but do you mean just follow my gut feelings when you say access your intuition?

Lilac I worked for a short time on a psychic phone line. Some of them will be genuine - but the chances are the company encourage them to keep clients on the line for a long time........its one reason why I stopped. It was unethical IMO. So don't go to a phone line psychic. Don;t go to ANY psychic about this in fact.

You KNOW you need to trust your own intuition.......it was very often what I would tell people if they had a reading from me. You see we are ALL psychic but too many people blunt their abilities, or doubt them. Why do you need anyone to tell you what you already know? You KNOW you have made the right decision about the relationship. There may well be someone in your future that you can have a good relationship with but I will tell you now the most important relationship you will ever have is with yourself. Until you love yourself you can never have a truly loving open relationship with anyone.

So take some time, learn to love yourself, and Mr Right may well come along......

Thanks Tashanie. Yeah that seems abit crazy keeping clients on for longer, suppose thats the way these companies make their money. So from what I've said you think I've made the right decision about my relationship? My feelings are still confused!

Maybe I'm not answering this right but do you mean just to follow your gut feeling?

Sorry if I'm not giving the right reply Amy but do you mean just follow my gut feelings when you say access your intuition?

Well whilst most people think that gut instinct and intuition are one and the same thing, I did research into this and (although there is an overlap) they are different!

Gut instinct can often spring from fear, tends to be very spontaneous/kneejerk and can be wrong.

Intuition always comes from a deep, wise place and has a ring of 'rightness' about it. It is best accessed when the mind is empty, i.e. not preoccupied with thought. This allows a 'space' for the solution to enter. It may not occur immediately, i.e. on the first occasion but is something that can be developed. You will know it because it casts no doubt and just feels the right thing to do.

Whilst you are confused then making the 'right' decision cannot be relied on i.e. if it comes from thought. Intuition comes from a deeper source.

An exercise you might try (just came to me now - an exercise I used to do when in a dilemma) might be to make 2 columns on a piece of paper and write down pros and cons i.e. what the conflict is i.e. just a line about each fear/hope etc. Then read each thought and - without thinking - mark it out of 10 for how strongly you feel about it! This may bring clarity into sorting out the wheat from the chaff.

Well whilst most people think that gut instinct and intuition are one and the same thing, I did research into this and (although there is an overlap) they are different!

Gut instinct can often spring from fear, tends to be very spontaneous/kneejerk and can be wrong.

Intuition always comes from a deep, wise place and has a ring of 'rightness' about it. It is best accessed when the mind is empty, i.e. not preoccupied with thought. This allows a 'space' for the solution to enter. It may not occur immediately, i.e. on the first occasion but is something that can be developed. You will know it because it casts no doubt and just feels the right thing to do.

Whilst you are confused then making the 'right' decision cannot be relied on i.e. if it comes from thought. Intuition comes from a deeper source.

An exercise you might try (just came to me now - an exercise I used to do when in a dilemma) might be to make 2 columns on a piece of paper and write down pros and cons i.e. what the conflict is i.e. just a line about each fear/hope etc. Then read each thought and - without thinking - mark it out of 10 for how strongly you feel about it! This may bring clarity into sorting out the wheat from the chaff.

I would have thought gut feeling and intuition were the same so that's interesting. I really need to clear my mind and hopefully things will get easier and the right answers will come to me. That sounds like a great exercise to do so thanks for that Amy.

Maybe I'm not answering this right but do you mean just to follow your gut feeling?

Sorry if I'm not giving the right reply Amy but do you mean just follow my gut feelings when you say access your intuition?

Studies of those people who 'follow their intuition' and those who don't show that the intuition-followers tend to make worse decisions than those who are more evidence based. And our guts are expert at telling us what we want to hear.

Is there someone sensible and fairly neutral (a good friend, maybe) with whom you can talk this over?

Studies of those people who 'follow their intuition' and those who don't show that the intuition-followers tend to make worse decisions than those who are more evidence based. And our guts are expert at telling us what we want to hear.

Is there someone sensible and fairly neutral (a good friend, maybe) with whom you can talk this over?

My research findings on the intuition/gut issue is that, since people are unclear of the distinction, they confuse the two. Our gut telling us what we want to hear is not the same as a good direction.

Following your intuition relies on accessing it in the first place and many just go with their gut feeling which, as explained, may not be accurate.

Intuition always comes from a deep, wise place and has a ring of 'rightness' about it. It is best accessed when the mind is empty, i.e. not preoccupied with thought. This allows a 'space' for the solution to enter. It may not occur immediately, i.e. on the first occasion but is something that can be developed. You will know it because it casts no doubt and just feels the right thing to do.

Or just feels the 'thing I want to do'.
I treated them separately as well. The studies were done on intuition.

Or just feels the 'thing I want to do'.
I treated them separately as well. The studies were done on intuition.

No - the right thing to do is not always what you want to do, there is a difference here! Pursuing selfish reasons is not always wise.

Can you provide the link to these intuition studies since most people do not understand the difference between this and gut instinct so I question the findings.

Well, that was interesting. The answer to your question is 'no'. I thought I could easily find you the reference - it was in an Oliver Burkeman article in The Guardian a year or so ago - but I couldn't. So I looked at other articles. And you are right - most of them don't distinguish between 'intuition' and 'gut instinct'.

However:
Instinct hasn't been proved to exist in humans.
Intuition is subject to our unconscious prejudices and is therefore not objective.

Well, that was interesting. The answer to your question is 'no'. I thought I could easily find you the reference - it was in an Oliver Burkeman article in The Guardian a year or so ago - but I couldn't. So I looked at other articles. And you are right - most of them don't distinguish between 'intuition' and 'gut instinct'.

However:
Instinct hasn't been proved to exist in humans.
Intuition is subject to our unconscious prejudices and is therefore not objective.

Well lots of things haven't been proved but do exist, e.g. love (scientists only specify hormonal changes which is such an inadequate appraisal of this experience!)

But examples of what we like to call 'love' abound. Give me an example of instinct.

But examples of what we like to call 'love' abound. Give me an example of instinct.

Well we refer to 'gut instinct' i.e. not an instinct as it is understood to mean with animals.

Well we refer to 'gut instinct' i.e. not an instinct as it is understood to mean with animals.

But in this case we are using 'gut instinct' to mean 'what I first think' in any situation. The word is pretty meaningless. In the sense of 'an innate behaviour', it is not found in humans.

But in this case we are using 'gut instinct' to mean 'what I first think' in any situation. The word is pretty meaningless. In the sense of 'an innate behaviour', it is not found in humans.

Yes well I have a low opinion of the merits of 'gut instinct' since, as I mentioned, it is often wrong anyway.

Which leaves us simply with 'intuition' - of which I have a low opinion.

Which leaves us simply with 'intuition' - of which I have a low opinion.

Why is that? Can you access your intuition?

I have found it invaluable in making beneficial directions and marvel at the wisdom that can be accessed from it. It feels like a divine, guiding hand and I am in awe of it.