Being tested

RE: Being tested

I seem to be*... although it's not a test. You have to find the spiritual lesson that God (etc) is trying to lead you through. I think completely submitting to the greater power (God/Divine/Greater Good/Higher Self/etc) is the best way to cope, and trying to look at problems you are experiencing from an observer rather than victim viewpoint. (Well, I think that's what Myss and Dyer are saying.)

* - I'm sure that if I really thought about things going on in my life currently, I could fall into a deep, dark pit of depression in no time at all.

RE: Being tested

Hi G,

Im just the same, just as we seem to be getting better with one area of our lives another thing happens, we seem to work so much harder for happiness than some others, but I do think this is life and as Darren says its working out the lesson to be learned as it's not always clearcut.

Don't give up

SaffronXX

RE: Being tested

Yes, Happy Pig - going through EXACTLY this myself, also Leo here and his son Stephen - BUT, what is normal?

As individuals, we face different sets of circumstances than others. There is great truth in the old saying, 'What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger'

and another

'God never gives you more than you can cope with'

The last one is so obviously untrue for some people otherwise there would be no suicides, however, 'tested' is also a good word.

The question here is really 'is this God testing you' or just Life's vagaries?

We could go very deeply into this, for example, was God 'testing' 6 million Jewish people during WW2, or 25 million murdered by Stalin?

History shows us that awful things appear to happen at random - how about the Tsunami last Xmas?

Is anyone safe? No, not at all - [:-] is this all a learning period for us here, 'Yes' I think it could well be' 😉

But DOES what happens to you make you stronger - yes if you allow it to do so, and ACCEPT the fugg you have to fight through to get to the other side.

Love Gillyxxx

RE: Being tested

Hi all

'Being tested' is an aspect that for us contradicts the our understanding that God/spirit is unconditional love. Mind you that all depends how you perceive God/spirit. 'Being tested' also brings judgement into the equation, again a concept that has no place within the realm of Spirit.

I think its far more a case of life as we live it, after all free will means exactly that. I think it is too easy for any of us to use Spirit as a cop out when the choices we have made do not work out very well.

Steve

RE: Being tested

But Steve, surely Happy Pig is referring to events which happen out of the blue: accidents or illnesses for example, which could not possibly (or would seem not to) be the 'result of choices we have made'. For the record, Happy Pig, my own feeling is that sometimes situations present themselves wherein we have the opportunity of reacting in a positive way, which is ultimately of benefit to us, or in a negative way, which doesn't do anyone any good. So we have the choice at that point, after or during the event. We grow and evolve according to the way we deal with life's vagaries. And, yes, sometimes some people appear to have to go through more 'stuff' than other people. (I am speaking here from personal experience, btw. Some years back my life appeared to lurch from one 'nightmare' to another. I distinctly remember wishing I could 'let go' and maybe fall into some breakdown, whereby I would be taken away and looked after. But it didn't work out like that, possibly because I knew, deep down, that the situation would not change even if I gave up. So I struggled on and ultimately was 'rewarded' by finding myself on this (spiritual) path which has given me an enormous amount of insight into my own personal drama. Much of the situation has not changed, but my way of dealing with it certainlly has.

Phew - I didn't realise I was going to write so much. Sorry. Anyway the short answer to the original question is, IMHO, yes!

Love and blessings
Sunanda xxx

Edited to say: Hang on in there. When it's really bad, that just might be as bad as it's going to get, in which case the only way is up. On the other hand...:D

RE: Being tested

Thanks for all these wonderful responses and a huge hug to those of you who are struggling with 'life as we know it'. Steve, I don't disagree with you. It is about choices made, even if that is the choices we made about our current carnation. I can be an appauling optimist - thinking I can do impossible numbers of tasks in no time at all, that I can afford impossible amounts out of tiny budgets at work. Often these unrealistic apsperations result in far more being done in the time or more being acheived on a tight budget etc. But I think that when I was choosing this incarnation I was overly optimistic in what I can deal with. Just to give you a flavour of it - I was born to two parents who almost certainly suffered from bipolar affective disorder (manic depression), my mother was alcohollic, so I grew up in a very unstable environment, but surrounded by brilliance and some of the most amazing people. There was sexual abuse, but not within the family when I was just too young and aware to be able to make choices to avoid the situation (I was 7/8). I started to show blatant signs myself of manic depression in my teens. I met and fell in love with a gay man and I chose to marry him, with the resultant hurt. In one 3 month period my father died from lung cancer, I lost a second baby, and my marriage finally crumbled. My mother died from oesophageal cancer 6 years later when I was 30. Throughout all of this is the thread of bipolar and the symptoms of that which can be very difficult to integrate into a stable homelife. It's like I've chosen to live on a raft in the middle of the Atlantic with almost persistent storms going on.

On a daily basis our choices obviously influence events. This is particularly true for me in the relationships I choose to have with people. I find people fascinating and tend to see good and potential in all. I can't walk by anyone or anything in life and so get entangled in some big messes. My relationships with men have been a series of disasters, but I do recognise that I have choice in how I project myself and who I draw to me.

In the background there is always the spectre of suicide looming and it can seem like the only real solution at times.

Please don't doubt that I think life can be and is wonderful, but just sometimes I struggle and when I can't see the reason in the suffering it is hard to resolve.

With love

G

RE: Being tested

Hi G,

My goodness you have had it hard, I relate to your childhood experience and as I previously said find that Im constantly finding myself in situations.

I think this is a very complicated matter and I certainly don't 'blame' God/ anybody for the resulting dramas, but I do think they are sent to help us grow as a person, I think each problem we encounter gives us extra insight, knowledge and empathy into others situations and this in turn gives us the skills to not only better our own circumstances but hopefully the situations of other people.

Many of our problems are our own making, and I think we encounter the same probnlem in different circumstances until we learn how to handle it, I have found that this often means not allowing the problem to bother me.

I too suffer with trying to do too much with too little time or budget, we run our own business's and we are constantly trying to do things without the necessary tools or money, Im afraid this is still an issue we have to deal with.

A former boss once told me ' sometimes to do a job well is not to give 100% ' and I do try and remeber this.

The suicidal thoughts are a worry, sucide is no way out, I belive that if you jump you will only have to learn these lessons again, who wants that ??.

As Steve mentioned we all have free will, but I don't think its a cop out to accept that spirit has an involvment with the circumstances of our lives, more that the plans are laid and we have the free will to learn from them or not.

Love Luck and Happiness to you

SaffronXX

RE: Being tested

Hi Happy

Well you sure chose to experience difficult emotions that’s for sure. But that is it entirely. We choose the emotions to experience and the parents that will allow that experience to take place. Plus those choices are made while we are in the fullness of Spirit. This means that we have all of our spiritual knowing at our disposal. So the emotions we choose seem easy to overcome (and so we bite off more than we can chew). But then we are born into the 3rd dimension and as such our knowing does not transfer. But the effect of birth can be devastating to some of the more evolved aspects of Spirit. We are born equal no matter what our station might be in Spirit.

But whatever the emotions chosen it all comes down to individual self worth and acceptance by the individual that they are worthy of and capable of expressing love without condition. The strength that this realization can give you is staggering. The trick is to remember it no matter what life throws at you, not always easy. We very quickly get used to beating ourselves up.

If you can remember to ‘think blue’ and in so doing prevent yourself from taking on the negative from others you will find considerable improvement in your state of being. The only emotion we should accept from others is love without condition. Anything less leads to disease and turmoil and if you happen to be very sensitive its even worse. Think Blue.

RE: Being tested

Hi All

This is one of our articles that shares information on some aspects of birth. You might find it interesting.
Steve

Birth And Choices

Before becoming embodied, a soul must choose to make that journey. The soul has decided what experiences it would like to have and those include ever more difficult expressions of being. A highly evolved soul will choose more difficult circumstances.

The initial task is to find the parents who will ensure that your chosen pathway will be encouraged. The personalities of the man who will be your father and the woman who will be your mother set up many of the early experiences you will have as a human being. Their relationship with each other, their attitude toward you as an infant and a growing child, their stance as to the moral standards they impart, the flexibility of their opinions, the expectations they hold for you, their willingness to grow and learn, their capacity to express love to each other and themselves, all are known factors before your advent.

Their union is the sharing of more than a casual relationship and the creation of a child is a solemn, yet joyous event. Even their attitude toward this human act will be reflected in your growing. So the parents are chosen according to what guidance they can give to you. Notice that in the choosing of parents no thought is given to the colour of the skin, the social or financial status of the family, the area of the world, or the political situation. These are external factors, which are always secondary to the primary attributes of the persons involved.

Then the specific type of experience is addressed. We mentioned that highly developed souls choose more difficult situations in life. That certainly includes physical disabilities, mental retardation as well as mental instabilities or situations of abuse, but can also incorporate those who exhibit low self-esteem, persons who are homosexual, those who are given for adoption. For example, a soul desiring to experience independence may choose to be born as a multiple—one of four, perhaps. Being born as a twin could also contribute to the inability to find a portion of existence that is yours alone.

There are also accidents that enter into the picture; events that were not planned but have an impact upon the life of that soul. Human neglect during pregnancy or childbirth could impair the ability of the child to function "normally." Improper treatment due to ignorance or misapplied knowledge can have unexpected results, such as the children of Thalidomide in the sixties. These are things that are impacted by the free will of others and cannot be predicted.

So the transition from the body of Spirit into the body of a human is, once again, a monumental, awesome respect for our free will. What we choose they will support. But it is also possible that we can make choices that are too much for our human frailties, especially as we try to deal with them as children. We may mourn the movement away from Spirit so much that we return to it, rejecting the being of humanity. It is this that we have previously referred to and you have named as autism.

Beyond the choice of parents and the kind of experience sought, all else is dependent upon the free will of every person upon earth. The birth of a handicapped child is not for the edification of the parents, who did not choose that condition; it is for the experience of the child him/herself. A child whose birth resulted in the death of his/her mother will often carry a great deal of guilt. It is not preordained that the child will be the cause of death—how could we explain that as Love?—but the experience will certainly set up a situation where the child will feel a responsibility for what s/he feels is unacceptable.

But it is important to say, also, that the choice of the child is independent of the actions of the ones who provide care. You cannot force a child to be autistic by any actions that you take or you fail to take. Neither can you force them not

RE: Being tested

Saffron

Thanks for your kind and wise words. I have always felt as though I am 'master of my own destiny'. I don't look to others to blame when things get difficult. Don't worry about the suicide thing. Whenever I get close to the edge something always pops up to ensure I don't succeed so I am being watched over. I was just trying to explain how close to the edge of the cliff face I often find myself.

Steve

Your posts were wonderful and helped to untangle so many of the 'why?'s that have been clogging up my head. I have already said it many times that if I had the chance to go back and change things in my life I wouldn't do it, because these are the experiences that have made me who I am and I quite like me.

Today Siggy offered a reading and kindly gave me a reading tonight which was just amazing and has helped me sort out some things that have really been confusing me and giving me grief. This reading really felt like a gift from the Universe, so thanks the Universe and thanks Siggy!

With love to all

G

RE: Being tested

I think I've just realised why I'm finding this situation more difficult than any time in the past. Despite being quite literally 'out of my mind' in the past, or in the pit of dispair, I always felt more secure than I do now. Maybe I felt more certain. Now I feel as though I'm having to pick my way across a floor full of woodworm or dry rot and it could crumble undrefoot at any time. Everything seem so uncercertain and changing and it seems so very personal that I really can't explain to anyone else what I'm going through. I feel more isolated right now than at any time in my life. This is strange because I'm not particularly sad and at times it feels wonderful. I just feel I really don't fit.

Not sure any of that makes sense

With love

G

RE: Being tested

Hi HappyPig

Why don't you visit the Healing and Prayers catagory on this site. There you can ask for healing to be sent to you. When this comes through you will realise that you are not on your own and there are strangers who will care enough about you that they will give their time and effort just for you.

Big Hug from me.

With love

Tracy

RE: Being tested

Hello G,

I resonate with what you have been saying in this thread. About 15 -20 years ago I also felt as if we were 'lurching' from one disaster to another, so much so that one night I asked when was it my turn to 'break'?. The voice that came back said "you will bend but you will never break. You are made of sterner stuff". I was SO upset, I didn't want to have this constant pressure on me, I wanted to have that moment when I couldn't take anymore and let someone step in and take over and take care of me. That of course never happened but I am a strong believer now that it's not WHAT life throws at us but how we DEAL with it. That's what makes the difference. You then have some control over how it affects you, you can look on the negative but you can also choose to act on the positive and I choose to do that.

I'm sorry you are going through all this at the moment, I truly feel for you having been there myself. There IS light at the end of the tunnel. Try to take the positive out of every situation and one day you will look back and say "well, if that hadn't had happened and I hadn't done/went onto doing so and so then I wouldn't be where I am today, a happy and balanced person"!

Love and light

reikiangel

xxx

RE: Being tested

Reikiangel

Thanks so much for your loving post. I know the truth in what you say and I know there is light at the end of the tunnel, but I still can't see which direction the tunnel goes to see the light! In general I feel incredibly blessed - I have the most fantastic son, amazing friends, enough money and a great house...and lots else. I am strong. I have always been someone who works out where I'm going, what's needed to get there and then goes full tilt to get there. But the problem now is that I really can't see where I'm going. My biggest problem is that I need to completely change my tack - I need to sit back and let let it happen and I need to TRUST :eek:. I am someone who has beaten a path through problems by taking control and not being in control terrifies me.

Thanks so much for sharing your own experiences with me. You seem now to be someone who is very settled and happy in where you are in life.

With love and thanks

G

RE: Being tested

Thanks Tracy for your advice. I have already got to realise what an amazing group of people there are here - the love and caring is palpable.

With love

G