Suppressed Anger

past life stuff maybe?

I did see your post in another thread but I didn't see anything about suggestions of past life healing or karmic readings. It could be some old karma or something from a past life making this anger come up in this life. I have only done research on it and not had a past life regression or anything done myself but it's a thought if you have been trying to stem the problem for a long time.;)

I think Reiki would be the ideal method for this, There are techniques that can remove the anger directly and this should be achievable in one or two treatments. You can find Reiki practitioners on healthypages or on some of the Reiki association websites and call and ask them if they have experience of working with deeply seated anger issues and take it from there..

Hi Sadsmile,

I can personally recommend Core Energetics for this. It's a body-centerd psychotherapy that's FANTASTIC at helping access and move that kind of deep seated anger and all buried feelings. It can be done one-on-one with a CE therapist but a 'process group' may be best - with more people comes more support, and more energy for getting to what's stuck.

I used to be REALLY British and reserved and frozen with my anger, this is what helped me express it.

Some London practitioners I've worked with and can recommend are Melissa Alachef and Robin Cameron, who run Core London [url]Practitioners | Core London[/url] . Their emails are on the Contact page of the website (Melissa is on maternity for another 2 months I think)

As a modality it can be very gentle - using breathing, mindfulness, gentle movement etc, but it also has big guns - padded bats and large foam cubes for you to let rip with, things to tear up, space (and encouragement) to stomp about, scream, rage - and lots of support to do so, from physical excersices which help energise and bring up squashed feelings, to personal support from the therapists. If you're ready and 'ripe' then there's the opportunity and means to go right into the feelings and let them out.

The Core Energetics training is 4 years long, it's a 'proper' modality. They can handle whatever comes up - sexual abuse, murder, sadism etc. Nothing is judged or rejected. A dear friend of mine had sessions with Melissa and was able to work with the things he'd previously been dismissed for by other therapists for being "too much" - he lived for years in a part of South Africa where gang rape and extreme violence was commonplace - all of his close friends were murdered (or dismembered). In Core Energetics with Melissa, he was able to safely work with that.

Yeah, reiki and EFT and ordinary talking therapies aren't the right tools for this. "If all you have is a hammer" etc etc..

I hope that recommendation helps - feel free to contact me if I can give more info or help (I don't check here very often, although I think probably I'll get email alerts if this thread gets replied to..)

Justin, why do you suggest that Reiki isn't the right tool for anger release?

Justin, why do you suggest that Reiki isn't the right tool for anger release?

A good question Amber Lady. Reiki wouldn't be my first choice...since I have hypnotherapy and EFT available to me. Both are very good at dealing with anger - but reiki DOES have the ability to help with emotional issues and could be helpful.

Actually the right therapy is the one the client feels drawn to . .............

Justin, why do you suggest that Reiki isn't the right tool for anger release?

Hi Amber Lady, good question! Reiki does and doesn't help for anger. There's a couple of things to say about that..

1) While reiki will help anyone for anything, that's not the same thing as being a panacea. Reiki isn't the needed treatment for all conditions, even though you can give it for all conditions.

eg If someone had scurvy through lack of vitamin C in their diet, they need citrus fruits and kiwis, not reiki. Of course, they are still helped by reiki, it's nice for them to have and does good things for them. But reiki doesn't cure vitamin C deficiency. More vitamin C does.

2) There's a quite strong anti-anger bias in the spiritual communities - the idea that healing will 'help' it because anger is 'negative', that we need to remove it. I really challenge that. Anger isn't something that can be cured or fixed, because its part of us, part of our humanity. The only thing about it that can be 'healed' is when it's being held onto and not allowed to flow.

The right practitioner to see for help with anger is one who has embraced their own. I know reiki healers who are also counsellors and psychotherapists who I'd happily refer people to for anger work, because they aren't scared by anger, they don't try to deflect it or prevent it. If someone is shaking with rage on the healing table because stuff is coming up, the person guiding you through can't be untrained when it comes to emotions, because they might make a blunder when the client is at their most vulnerable. That isn't safe.

"Just for today I will not anger" is I believe a reflection of Japanese uptight cultural attitudes to anger and emotion, not a universal spiritual truth. A reiki healer who takes that too seriously might cause emotional harm to someone who is suffering with a lot of anger. ie they might steer them towards repressing it further, because that's what they themselves do.

(that's not the fault of reiki, it's a human thing. But it's why you see an emotional release therapist for that)

3) There's a lack of awareness about the difference between superficial and deep anger. Or even that deep anger can exist. Superficial anger is like stress, is situational, and can be let go of easily enough. Reiki, meditation, any spiritual practice that helps a person to be centred will help it dissolve. That's part of spiritual development, of becoming more mindful, aware of your feelings, etc. For this, reiki is great.

However for deep anger it's different. Deep anger comes from deep wounds. Traumas, abuse, woundings.. With deep anger, the pieces needed are generally

a) a way to learn how to safely and authentically express it
b) finding, accepting and healing the parts of the self that were badly hurt (probably in childhood)

And whilst reiki is lovely, it doesn't enter into this inner emotional territory. People have different tools for getting there, but think of creative writing, journaling, expression through art, cathartic dance, dialoging with different parts of the self. That's more along the lines of deep emotional healing work.

Deep feelings need therapeutic processes to help them move. You can't do all of your healing lying on a table or sat in a chair. Eventually you have to claim and express your feelings. You need to be able to scream, shake, kick, etc. That isn't something you can take to reiki. We go to real therapists for that, who won't bat an eyelid if you need to scream, or do whatever it is you need to do.

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The "too long, didn't read" of that is: reiki will help for 'shallow' or transitory anger, but for deep anger, we need more and different help. That help may come from someone who has reiki training, but

Tashanie - with hypnotherapy and EFT that's more interesting to talk about for anger, as the practitioner is really in the driving seat there. My mum's been a hypnotherapist since I was 6, and an EFT practitioner too since.. urm.. a few years after that. I come from quite an alternative household :rolleyes:

As I understand it, there's two main ways a person might work with anger with hypnotherapy or EFT: "healing" (in the true sense) and "minimising.

For the first way, an example is timeline therapy: rolling back to the source of their anger, eg when the client was molested, and doing healing work - reframing the memories so that the young child could say "No!", or comforting that young part in some way... That kind of thing.

I'm all in favour of that.

The other broad approach would be is applying what works for physical pain reduction to emotions. Like "So let's count from 10 to 1; 10 is deep rage, and 1 is tranquility. When you get to 1, there will be no more rage"

That's the kind I think is harmful, and represents an unhealthy relationship to and understanding of anger. What we want to encourage is something along the lines of:

"It's ok to be angry. You can express your anger. All of you is welcome"

Unfortunately, too many people still believe something more like "Try not to be angry. It's bad to get angry. We won't approve of you if you are angry. Grownups can control their emotions, tantrums are for toddlers" etc.

So that's why, no matter what modality a person works with, I think it's important that the therapist/healer has done their own healing journey. It means they're really helping the client and giving them the support they need, rather than enacting their own childhood beliefs and wounding on them.

Tashanie - with hypnotherapy and EFT that's more interesting to talk about for anger, as the practitioner is really in the driving seat there. My mum's been a hypnotherapist since I was 6, and an EFT practitioner too since.. urm.. a few years after that. I come from quite an alternative household :rolleyes:

As I understand it, there's two main ways a person might work with anger with hypnotherapy or EFT: "healing" (in the true sense) and "minimising.

For the first way, an example is timeline therapy: rolling back to the source of their anger, eg when the client was molested, and doing healing work - reframing the memories so that the young child could say "No!", or comforting that young part in some way... That kind of thing.

I'm all in favour of that.

The other broad approach would be is applying what works for physical pain reduction to emotions. Like "So let's count from 10 to 1; 10 is deep rage, and 1 is tranquility. When you get to 1, there will be no more rage"

That's the kind I think is harmful, and represents an unhealthy relationship to and understanding of anger. What we want to encourage is something along the lines of:

"It's ok to be angry. You can express your anger. All of you is welcome"

Unfortunately, too many people still believe something more like "Try not to be angry. It's bad to get angry. We won't approve of you if you are angry. Grownups can control their emotions, tantrums are for toddlers" etc.

So that's why, no matter what modality a person works with, I think it's important that the therapist/healer has done their own healing journey. It means they're really helping the client and giving them the support they need, rather than enacting their own childhood beliefs and wounding on them.

I agree it is OK to be angry. In the case of suppressed anger there is probably something to be very angry about. Hypnotherapy has a number of different techniques. Timeline and EFT are two but there are others. But I disagree the therapist in the driving seat. I aim to let the patient find their own solution.

I think most therapists have done their own healing journey. I know I have. Not with anger but I have had my own issues to deal with.

But I still do not feel there is only 1 therapy that help. A lot depends on the rapport between the therapist and the patient. So one patient will respond well with one therapist and one therapy - while another will gain no benefit. I am not arrogant enough to believe I can get good rapport with every patient. I just do my best

Although emotions are often perceived as the problem to the person who is creating and experiencing them, to a healer who is looking to address the underlying cause of the emotional symptoms that are manifesting, they work as sign posts to help them to heal the underlying cause which is triggering the emotions.

As I understand it, there's two main ways a person might work with anger with hypnotherapy or EFT: "healing" (in the true sense) and "minimising.
For the first way, an example is timeline therapy: rolling back to the source of their anger, eg when the client was molested, and doing healing work - reframing the memories so that the young child could say "No!", or comforting that young part in some way... That kind of thing.
I'm all in favour of that.

And that's what effective therapists would be doing, whether they are doing EFT, hypnotherapy, timeline, shamanic work, counselling, EMDR, body psychotherapy, creative therapies etc.. My mantra is the words of the wonderful Jessica Mor, "Letter "T" in "tapping" stands for: "Tell the truth!" which I teach to my students and try to convey to my colleagues and supervisees whenever I can.

And yes, there are too many practitioners (in most therapeutic modalities) who minimise client's pain and its origins, often with disastrous results.

But I am curious justinbonnet that you attribute this minimising to certain therapies?

Yes indeed there are EFT/NLP practitioners, hypnotherapists, counsellors etc (some of them very well known, respected and ubiquitous on YouTube and social media) who have not done enough of their own work and they cannot bear the other's pain, so they minimise it, contain it, put pretty covers on it etc - but there are so many others who connect deeply, stay with the pain, allow the client to get in touch with it safely, with the healing taking place naturally as a result.

So would agree with Tashanie that it is not about specific therapeutic approaches, it is about the individual therapist and their connection with the client.

A good article on this topic is "The Curse of Premature Reassurance" by Andy Hunt [url]The Curse Of Premature Reassurance | practical wellbeing[/url]

Masha

Breathwork

Hiya, Sad Smile,

Lots of advice and things to think about and you really need to tune into self and see what resonates with you... however if you get time check out Breath4Life Breath Work and Pennie Quaile Pearce, she is one of the most amazing people on the planet at this time and I've done a lot of research. I came across her through a friend, She is one of those people who works quietly in the background, who actually makes profound changes in communities and on a global scale. She teaches energetics which includes emotional wellbeing as she encourages all to realise that Emotion should be that Energy in Motion, not Estuck...what you can feel you can heal etc... if you get time check it out it would be worth your while :rolleyes: