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Hi everyone
Tonight I went into college and got the shock of my life. The head of the departement pulled me into her office and said an official complaint had being made about me in regards to me using Reiki in College.
I was floored has I have not purpously used Reiki while doing this new course, but the department head said I had, and then refered to a conversation I had with the person who had made the complaint.
I was giving this girl a massage and off handly said, wow I can feel the Reiki flowing while massaging you. Nothing else was said. A little later while doing the foot massage I found a crystal in the sinus area and asked if she had being poorly with a cold recently, she affirmed she had. THAT WAS IT. But this girl has run home crying to her mother saying that I had done something to her and said, I had said she was going to be ill. I am shocked, hurt and gutted. I would NEVER say anything like this, I know too well the consequenses of making a statement like that.
I told the department head I would apologise to the girl in question, but she said that wasn't necessary, afterwards I thought, why should I apologise I did nothing wrong, it was just a general comment, but this girl has turned it into something more and twisted things. The college has agreed to let the matter go has things were totally misunderstood. But I feel like a criminal.
Luckily I didn't have to stay in college tonight and face the girl. (I have already done the work that was going to be worked at this evening) But I am still not sure what to do. She is my massage partner and a big part of me wants to completely ignore her from now on and find another person to work on. I am so hurt that she went behind my back and made this complaint...........I could of being kicked out of college for this. I do know one thing, I will never mention Reiki or Reflexology in college again.
Any advice what I should do?
Love Angel xxx
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
Hi. I am sorry that this has happened to you, how horrible.
Try not to worry about it as it has been sorted, try and put it behind you and you are quite within your rights to face her and tell her that under the circumstances it might be best if you don't work together again. She may well avoid you anyway now as she might feel awkward.
Best not to mention such things again as you have said.
Not everybody wants this or is open to it and you must always ask permission before giving Reiki or healing anyway. If you feel healing energy coming through during a treament then always 'ask' for permission beforehand and if you don't get it then don't give it. You can ask the person outright or you can ask their 'higher self'. This has been stressed to me on my healing course and I was told under no uncertain terms not to go there otherwise.
I hope it blows over, I am sure it will, you meant no harm. Big hug.
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
Hi Angel and Candie,
Sorry about the experience. Yes, I would change partners if possible. When is your course finishing? Any chance of talking to the girl afterwards?
The "problem" with Reiki is that the energy flows by itself if the person you are working on is open to "attract it". It can be that the higher self is ready to recieve Reiki, but the person is not.
Artemis
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
Yes, agreed. But you should always ask.
I was told by my tutor on the spiritual healing course that 'you don't want to go there karmically.' Oh sorry if spelling is wrong!
He told us that he was called to give healing to a boy who had been in a coma for 9 months and when he asked the boy appeared face to face with him and said 'fuck off'. he backed off.
Really. Don't do it.
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
Hi Angel…
What an awful experience!!
It is a good thing you did not have to ‘face’ her straight away, because it gave you time to think and reflect on what has happened.
I can’t say weather you should change partners or not. I think you will know better than any one else how to handle this situation, when you get to your class again…
All I can say is - use this whole affair as a positive lesson and grow stronger and wiser as a result…
Universe sometimes use people around us to teach us more about ourselves…
An analogy that I love to use, when another person rubs me up the wrong way is -
See the person (causing the ‘problem’) as sandpaper rubbing against you, smoothing the rough edges away…
Why don’t you meditate on this tonight and handle it the way you know you should…
Amber
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
Hi,
It must be hard, but don't dwell on it, your partner has something she needs to deal with and you,unfortunately are the brunt of it. Be strong, think of the precepts and let it go.
You did what you thought was right andyou cannot be wrong about that. Perhaps it is a lesson for you to be cautious about what you say to clients- its very difficult when you have information - only when the client is ready should you pass it on- I seem to remember reading somewhere ' if you hear it three times then passit on' . if not, use your intuition.
hey, I've done it and regrettred it so don't feel bad- youmeant well.
go well
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
next time you see her tell her that you've put a curse on her
lol, only joking thats a bit harsh....
But it sucks that that happened, If it were me I would pull her to one side and try to have a conversation with her about the whole episode. Honesty is the best policy, i think the world would be a totally differant place if people would just talk and listen to each other.
good luck!
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
I must say that I tend to agree with Dr Mambo here when he says that honesty is the best policy. After the initial dust has settled i would be inclined to take the girl to one side and have a quiet word to her, if nothing else to try and clear the air between the two of you, and explain to her how you feel about the whole thing. Without communication after all; nobody learns anything, and the situation will not be resolved. This does sound though like a truly horrible experience. Whatever you decide to do though good luck, and it will be the right thing for you. You know you will always get support from us.
June
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
Dear Angel,
You and your massage partner have both had an unpleasant experience BUT it has been - and will continue to be - a learning experience for you both.
As Steve Green has said above, you can learn by abiding by the precepts. Do not get angry with your partner, show her love and respect, work hard at your relationship with her and GENTLY try to explain about Reiki to her, be grateful that you and her have this opportunity to learn together and DO NOT WORRY.
Please remember that she may not understand and might be confused. If she is very young and has never heard of Reiki or experienced Reflexology, what you did to her that evening must have seemed like magic. However, if she DOES understand about both therapies - are her family 'religious' and subscribe to the Church's view that Reiki is not 'Christian' - in this case there are many quotations in the Bible to help overcome this view.
Dear Angel, please try to look on this whole episode as a very great learning process for you both.
You have our support, here on HP, and can always come back for more help and advice from us all.
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
Hi Angel
Sorry to here you have had this happen to you I know it is distressing but it is good to reflect on what have you have learnt. Not every one is as enthusiatic and into Reiki as we are and sometimes people do fear it for what ever reason. I was at a dinner not so long ago with a lay preacher and we were talking quit happily until I mentioned I did reiki the bomb went off I was told I would go to hell and was doing the devils work. It showed me that there are still a lot of people who fear what they do not understand. Years ago when I trained in hypnotherapy again that was seen as a bit dark by some cirlces now it is more acceptable.
Try not to let it get to you and send her lots of love
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
Hi Angel
First and foremost, send love to the situation do not view this negatively. If someone is having a massage they may well be unprepared for you to give them insight on their body and can come as a shock so keep the two separate, obviously when you are trained up and your paying clients know you do both you can ask them at the consultation stage if they want to know and if they say know then dont tell them.
This girl may just have been having a bad day, run down if she had a cold, received reiki, massage and a bit of reflex that could overload us all on the healing crisis point, wrong place wrong time! It will be fine, please be strong enough to try and not avoid her, continue with respect and concentrate on her highest good if you continue partnering her. Avoiding people leads to all sorts of stress and can divide classes in half, you have the reiki take some for yourself...
love
T
x
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
WOW, thank you all so very much for your comments, they have really helped me a great deal.
Last night I went to bed and lay awake for hours just pondering on this issue. In the end I sent Reiki to the situation and I managed to go to sleep, I awoke this morning feeling a whole lot beter about the issue.
My next class is on Monday so I have a few days to really decided what to do, one thing I am sure of is that I am not going to touch her again, I can't be quite sure that the Reiki won't start flowing again, so I am not going to take the risk.
To be honest, I feel this girl is not mature enough to do a Massage course if she has to have her mother complain on behalf of her, I just wish she'd had the bottle to confront me herself, I am not a nasty person, in fact people find it very easy to talk to me. I know I should forgive her but I can't believe she put my career at risk like that. I think it might be for the best that I just completely ignore her from now on, I don't think I dare take the risk explaining Reiki to her, she might run and tell her mum I am talking witchcraft or something. lol
Thanks again for all the support, I half expected getting a slating from people here too, you are all wonderful people with kind open hearts.
Love Angel xxx
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
It might be hard to see it, but you are actually acting as a teacher for this girl.
You are actually giving her the gift of allowing her to confront her fears, which takes a lot of courage to do, and is an entirely selfless act on your part. She is now being given the choice of whether or not she wishes to explore them further at this point in time.
Sorry if this is a bit 'heavy', but as a healer you are constantly putting yourself out there, and have to allow the other person to either accept or reject what you are offering. Not easy, I know.
Just surround her with light, and keep sending out those positive vibes. And remember the 'protection bubble' at all times when working on someone else.
good luck!!
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
Hi LJHUK
Thanks so much for reminding me about the protection buble, I had completely forgotton all about that. I remember to do while doing Reiki but forgot all about while doing Body Massage.
Has for learning, well I sure have learned a valuable lesson this time.
Love Angel xxx
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
Hi Angel…
To be honest, I feel this girl is not mature enough to do a Massage course if she has to have her mother complain on behalf of her, I just wish she'd had the bottle to confront me herself, I am not a nasty person, in fact people find it very easy to talk to me. I know I should forgive her but I can't believe she put my career at risk like that. I think it might be for the best that I just completely ignore her from now on, I don't think I dare take the risk explaining Reiki to her, she might run and tell her mum I am talking witchcraft or something. lol
I don’t think you should ignore or take any kind of negative action or attitude towards this girl…
At the same time I have to agree with you (even though it has been suggested otherwise) not to discuss Reiki with her again, unless she asks you to. She seems to be a little sensitive and chances are that she might ‘misunderstand’ you again…
You are understandably concerned and upset about your career being put on the line by this girls’ behaviour. But any negative behaviour from your side might just cause a rift in the whole class and that will really be uncomfortable and unnecessary…
Although I have a lot of sympathy for you, I also have sympathy for the girl. I don’t think it is fair to accuse her of not being mature enough for the massage cause, because of the way she reacted…
I think you should try and put yourself in her position...
For all you know, she might have been really spooked by what happened and understandably reached for the person closest to her for assistance in handling a very unsettling experience…
What you have done, although it was totally unintentional, was like a kind of invasion of this girls’ privacy?
I hope you don’t find this too harsh, but I think you have to try and remove yourself from this whole situation (you have a whole weekend, which in itself is a good thing) and try to see it from the outside in to try and get some perspective on the matter…
I agree with the others that you should rather view this as a positive experience and learn from it. Just think, if yours and this girls paths did not cross in this way, and things did not happen the way they did, you might not have learned this valuable lesson and who knows in what kind of trouble you could have gotten into, in future?
Love and light
Amber
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
It is always a shock when we get an unexpected strong reaction to what we do and sometimes it is hard to always live by the precepts but all we can do is keep trying.
When i did IHM t college some of the students were very young and immature, quite disruptive as if they were at school. Others were very mature for their age but none of them took seriously or understood any of the teaching on chakras and energy clearing that was taught as part of the IHM routine. After making daft comments etc they agreed to do just go through the motions to pass the course as it was a module of their beauty therapy course. I was irritated at the time but then thought about how open i would have been to that information when i was 16/17. I consciously didn't mention my Reiki in class even tho all the students i practised remarked about how hot my hands got during a treatment and several commentrd on my "healing hands"
I am sorry you had that experience but as everyone says just put it down to experience and keep practising the precepts.
I am happy to send Reiki to you and the situation
love and light
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
Hi Hamadryat
I have taken no offence in what you have said, in fact I agree with a few things you have said, and I have learnt from this mistake. I have no intention of causing any rifts in the class, but I really do not want to work with her...i've now got a strange feeling about her, not sure what but I really don't want to touch her again.
Hi Soar,
I know how you feel too. In our class the average age of the students is about 22. We have some that are 18 - 19 years old, a few of them are great and talk to you like you are human and not over the hill, but there is 4 girls that continually talk and giggle over the tutor, they sit quite close and often I miss hearing what the tutor is saying because of their noise.
OH well, only another 6 weeks to go.:eek:
Love Angel xxx
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
Just a feeling Angel but the Tutor appears not to be fully in control of the class. When you are trained as an adult education tutor you are taught how to handle difficult situations. I dont know if you have spoken to your tutor about the disruptive element. I use to teach counselling skills in adult education and I always made sure I moved peole working together arround it is better for learning and teaching. Not every one can get on it is unrealistic and if it is going to effect your learning and gaining a qualification your needs should be met and the tutor should listen to you after all she has listened to your partner.
Keep your chin up
Love and light
RE: Official Complaint Made About Reiki
HI SA
Our teacher does keep asking the girls to listen etc, but has soon as she starts talking to the rest of the class they start off again. I think she is just trying to keep the peace, but it does get annoying.
Love Angel xxx