Am i just being silly?

RE: Am i just being silly?

Very interesting. I work from home and had a call from a male. He complimented me on my advertising and said he had seen my brochure left on the table. I think he has saw me leave it by accident from what he said. he did ask about reflexology and I was stunned to have a male contact me that I flustered a bit. I felt bad and thought he sounded genuine and rather sweet . so I texted him wtih answers to his questions saying he was welcome to book if he needed a treatment.
I felt a bit guilty and thought that maybe he was needing help with stress and thought that as a person he had as much right to reflexology as a women. Also I knew that statisics say men find it difficult to ask for help so felt more oblidged. He did not book but said he might in the future. I then kept getting texts saying "not stressed yet" then a week later "off to see my boys I hope you are well". I replied to the first to say "good" and then ignored the latter. I have not heard from him.
I will personally ensure my partner is home when booking in male clients and make them aware of this. I have heard from a therapist friend of incidents with male clients.

I have not and will not visit males in their own home unless I know the client and they have been referred. If you do ever visit a male client I would strongly advise that you have a support network in place. Agree that you will call someone on the dot when you are scheduled to finish, get that person to call you 5 mins over time. Keep your mobile on vibrate in your pocket and inform them you will call them 10 mins after their call and if not this could signify a problem. Ensure they have the address and contact of where you are for any emergency calls that could be made. Or have their number ready to press to dial if you have trouble and have them on alert for your call if you should need. JUST IDEAS, I AM NOT A MOBILE THERAPIST.

RE: Am i just being silly?

Hi Kate,
I'm not a reflexologist, I'm a hypnotherapist, and I'm not mobile but I see people in my own home! Other than those differences I have had the same dilemma (sp?) as you. I'd say my client base is 50:50 male:female ratio.

Before I take a booking from anyone I have a telephone consultation - this is around 10 minutes and gives me an idea of how I feel about the person and I ALWAYS follow my intuition. If I think they're someone I'd rather not work with, I tell them I'm quite busy at the moment but can offer them an appointment in 6 weeks time - most people will try to find someone else rather than wait 6 weeks. If I think I'd rather not see them on my own, then I make an appointment for the evening or weekend when my partner is around. I will only see a male client when I'm on my own if I feel they are genuine - even then I get a neighbour to look out for me.

And yes, if I were a mobile therapist I'd have safeguards in place as suggested by portiaophelia.
Hope that helps!
Amber

RE: Am i just being silly?

Hello there everyone

Kate, I don't think you're being silly at all. You need to feel comfortable and safe doing your work. My own personal 'rule' is that I treat men who are friends/husbands/relatives of my friends or clients and so far this has worked just fine. On the odd occasion when a man I don't know has phoned up and booked in I've made sure my husband was at home. On each of these occasions the man has come for one appointment only and I haven't heard from him again. I now have applied a personal rule for my own comfort and well-being that when a man phones whom I don't know I refer him to a colleague. This decision has made me feel much less stressed about things and I am pleased I've made it.

RE: Am i just being silly?

You raise a very important issue, and the advice given by respondents seems very wise.

I am a male reflexologist just starting out at age 57. I will be offering therapy from my home, with my wife usually available elsewhere in the house. The question of home visits to female clients might arise, and I've been wondering about how to respond. Friends of family or friends should be no problem, but previously unknown clientsperhaps should be seen only in my home, with wife nearby.

Any thoughts or experiences would be welcome.

Peaky

RE: Am i just being silly?

Hello Peaky

It's good to see things from the perspective of a male reflexologist, and your plan sounds like an excellent one to me. I imagine that if you go to see a client in their home most people will ask a friend or someone else to be around for that first encounter - I think I would if I was going to welcome a stranger into my home for the first time. You might even want to take the initiative and suggest it in a neutral sort of way, ie not making a big issue of it.

I see a male kinesiologist in his home and I don't think there is anyone in the house but him when I go there. However, he came on a recommendation from a friend so I had faith in his professional integrity and didn't have any concerns about seeing him alone. Your reputation will quickly grow as this man's has, and people will see that you are a serious and trustworthy professional.

RE: Am i just being silly?

Hallo At One,

Thanks for that. It's good to hear an independent, informed view.

Kind regards

Peaky

RE: Am i just being silly?

Hi Kate,

I don't think you're being silly ~ I think you're being sensible. I have a few male clients, but work from home and so my hubby is generally around .....

I was wondering though if there was a therapy centre nearby ~ perhaps you could try to arrange to rent a room just for an hour or so from them ~ that way you could see any male clients as and when you needed ??

Meridianmoon xxx

RE: Am i just being silly?

Hi Guys,

Thanks for all the tips and advice.

I have decided that its time to clear out the room in my house that i originally wanted to use as a therapy room when i first started out. Over time, its just been filled with junk as i didn't think i would need it anytime soon (all of my clients so far have wanted me to visit their homes and have all been female.) I spoke to my husband about it last night and he agreed. He said that in the future i could treat any male clients in the house while he was around. I think having another male presence in the house would put off any 'dodgy' clients, and i would feel alot more comfortable knowing that my husband was in the other room.

Again, thanks for all of your replies.

Kate x

RE: Am i just being silly?

Hi there You have started a very interesting and important thread. I am just about to(hopefully) qualify as a reflexologist. I already work from a therapy room in my home(i do hypnotherapy) so I understand your fears at having male clients. I have a 2 year old daughter and am expecting my second child(on the date of my final reflexology A&P exam date lol). Ialways take clients(hypnotherapy) during creche hours(9-1) somy daughter is not disturbing me, and while my husband is at work, so I am alone in the house with each client. Like you I worry. So the precautions I take are the following: I always take a 'new' male client(or a female I am not too sure about)in the evenings or weekends when my partner is home and if I trust him then I will see him alone the next time. Additionally I always state thatI have company in the house(leaving a t.v on in another room is often convincing). After all the client only has access to my therapy room and maybe the toilet which is beside it, so would not be aware if I was alone or not.So far so good It is awful that we have to take so many precautions but sadly it is a sign of the times :(. As for visiting clients in their homes, I dont drive so I find this too difficult(driving lessons are on the list). Blessings and take care