There are 3 negative people in my life, (not related to me), who verbally bully, hurt and upset me so much it's making me feel ill. I have asked what the problem is but their usual answer is, "YOU tell me". I have tried to deflect them by imagining a mirror sending back their hurtful behaviour. I have imagined a thick pane of glass between me and them. I have tried to envelop myself in protective white light but nothing helps.
Of course I will not curse them as it goes against my beliefs and the law of Wicca but I feel so aggrieved I just want to lash out.
Could i cast a spell to remove them from my life but in a nice way?!
Has anyone please got any advice?
Bright blessings, Silvermist x
If you read my post from just over a year ago, the same thing was happening with a different person. I appreciated the response to my post and in the end rose above it and managed to mentally blank this woman from my life. If she was in the same room as me I felt nothing towards her - it was as if she ceased to exist and therefore could no longer hurt me.
What I was wondering now, because the same thing is happening a year later, is there some sort of higher force at work against me? Is this some sort of 'cycle' or am I being paranoid? I don't understand why I seem to attract this unpleasant attention.
I am (usually) a very positive person. I appear confident and outgoing but being a typical Cancerian, no one would believe what I am feeling deep underneath my protective shell.
Any thoughts on this repeat of events?
Bb xx
Hello Silvermist
There are 3 negative people in my life, (not related to me), who verbally bully, hurt and upset me so much it's making me feel ill. I have asked what the problem is but their usual answer is, "YOU tell me".( If their usual answer is ‘you tell me’ do you have any thought what they re referring to? Do you think there is an element of yourself which may have had a contribution to the people feeling this way?)
I have tried to deflect them by imagining a mirror sending back their hurtful behaviour. I have imagined a thick pane of glass between me and them. I have tried to envelop myself in protective white light but nothing helps. (Do you feel by creating visual deflection is a way to try to avoid dealing with the problem at its source and in person? Trying to imagine some external rescuer that will create a lifetime Barrier against the hurt you feel? Is it the case that sometimes trying to create imaginary protective methods work to an extent as to the amount of intention and faith placed upon them, in the end finding the problem still exists, this is why nothing helps. Internal coping methods are created.)
Of course I will not curse them as it goes against my beliefs and the law of Wicca but I feel so aggrieved I just want to lash out. (Understandable you want to lash out. To experience the constant upset that you are going through. With every problem born the answer comes instantly with it, Both problem and answer comes to your awareness sometimes so quickly that the answer could be lost in the preoccupation of the problem. The answer can too be difficult to face because it may mean there is some action required from yourself to dissolve the situation).
Could i cast a spell to remove them from my life but in a nice way?! (I don’t know much about spells but I feel fairly sure they could continue to be in your life until the truth of the matter is faced and resolved. This may cause anxieties in a way of indecisiveness for a way forward)
(It seems although you have expressed they verbally bully, hurt and upset you there is still dialogue there. As you ask the question what is the problem and that they seek from you an answer, something they may need to face themselves. In any case no one should be subjected to any form of abuse. If you feel there is a possibility of all of you sitting down and exploring what the problem is without the need for defences a lot can be achieved, who knows maybe becoming friends again? I don’t know if they have been past friends etc. I hope you may find the courage and your inner strength to find a way forward.)
"no one would believe what I am feeling deep underneath my protective shell".
( This would be a good place to start );)
"Any thoughts on this repeat of events?" (Consider is this event really connected to the past a year ago and a repeat?)
"I being paranoid?" (Paranoia has various levels of assesment and cannot be confirmed fully based on the conent of your post. but connecting the past event with this one I see where you could feel paranoia may be a possibility)
Apologies I just posted my reply and just notcing you mentioned an older post which I was not aware of.
Take Care.
Blessings
Sacrel
All people situations, events are a trigger to emotional responses in you. Very intense in you at times. Thats all.
Just give yourself spacwe and time to feel those emotions rather than talk about them-either within your head or to friends/forums etc
You will see in some time to come that those people helped you grow within. You feel like cursinhg them they desrve your blessings and gratitude. (Ok! Lets not run away with that!)
I am sure you know it is a reflection of you-all out there. So don't chase reflections. stay in your heart opening up to the pain, rancour, anger etc caused by these people.Allow the reactions, they trigger. They will leave you alone or become sweet as a pie
They are all there to stretch you, your understanding, heart, love everything! Generally most buggers are the best friends for they can touch something very deep in you. Good thing-without exception
Just see that you are very focused on them and want to get these people to mend their ways. "I am right and they are wrong"," they are bullies and my heart is bleeding".
If truth be known they think likewise. That is causing the situation to unfold as it does-over and over.
Withdraw your focus from this kind of relating.
You must have some in your life who are kind, gentle and make you feel good about you. Maybe post about them, because it will give a clear comparison between talking of stuff that sucks and one that lifts.
May it resolve beautifully
The little I know about Wicca is that spells must be cast so that 'harm comes to none' If removing these people form your like would harm them , the spell has no chance of succeeding.
Putting my therapists head on - if a relationship is not good the only person you have any influence over is YOU. You can change how you act,react.or think.
Consider this situation. A man is driving to a party with his wife. Another motorist cuts him up and he rages about inconsiderate drivers. His wife has heard this so many times before, she snaps at him and they arrive at the party in a sullen silence.
The same situation but this time the wife (having realised after years of experience that snapping does no good) simply sighs inwardly. The husband calms down after a bit and they arrive at the party prepared to enjoy themselves
The same situation but this time the husband wonders what was going on the other drivers life and why he was in such a hurry. He wonders if maybe there is a fmaily emergency - and he and his wife discuss how lucky they are and arrive at the party in good spirits
We ALWAYS have a choice about how we react to any other person. All to often we react out of habit.
There is ALWAYS a protective purpose to anyones apparently unreasonable behaviour... and the chances are it isn't aimed specifically at YOU.
Maybe all you need to do is make different choices. One choice may well be to severe your connection with the people involved - but the recurrence is an indication there is something YOU need to learn about yourself
Hello there Silvermist,
Whilst yes Wicca states that you should "harm none", that includes yourself, if these people are causing you health issues in their bullying you are allowed to protect yourself in anyway you feel is appropriate. From your messages you have tried many ways of dealing with this situation by protecting yourself.
They may be jealous of your confidence and that is why they are trying to bring you down. Try to ignore their comments and continue to shine. Be the best person that you can be.
As this has happened before, maybe there is something for you to learn which is why it is repeating a pattern. What do you need to learn?
Stay strong Silvermist.
Blessed be
Just a thought........
Thank you everyone for your replies which have helped a great deal.
You have given me the strength to look at this more objectively: how i need to learn and address certain aspects of myself, what I may have done that cause people to behave like this and how I can improve from these experiences.
I intend to ignore the 3 people concerned, be strong and be the best I can be to myself and others. This is also what I will do should it ever happen again. Hopefully it won't because I have learned from your posts that only i am in control of my choices and reactions.
Also to appreciate the positive aspects of my life rather than dwell on the negative. In particular close family and friends who love and support me unconditionally. I am blessed.
I'm sorry I haven't quoted individually in this message but my posting skills are rather basic :confused: I hope to improve.
Thank you all once again.
Bright blessings, Silvermist x
Groundedness and Protection
There are 3 negative people in my life, (not related to me), who verbally bully, hurt and upset me so much it's making me feel ill. I have asked what the problem is but their usual answer is, "YOU tell me". I have tried to deflect them by imagining a mirror sending back their hurtful behaviour. I have imagined a thick pane of glass between me and them. I have tried to envelop myself in protective white light but nothing helps.
Of course I will not curse them as it goes against my beliefs and the law of Wicca but I feel so aggrieved I just want to lash out.
Could i cast a spell to remove them from my life but in a nice way?!
Has anyone please got any advice?
Bright blessings, Silvermist x
[COLOR="Sienna"][COLOR="DarkGreen"][COLOR="Indigo"]Why do you allow others such access into your space?
:nature-smiley-008: