Hi,
This isn't about health as such but I am hoping someone maybe able to help me. My son is 7 and he has a 7 year old cousin that he doesn't see very often as we live a long way from them. My mother-in-law likes to see all her grandchildren together sometimes. My problems is that my nephew is a highly unpleasant child. I don't like saying that about a child and it certainly isn't his fault as we can see his upbringing has caused him emotional issues. However at worst he bullies my son and daughter and at best he is extremely controlling and domineering towards my son. I always try to be kind and loving towards him and I discipline him fairly if I see him doing something unkind - because his mother and my in laws don't seem to see the problem. I have asked my mother and father in law for more help with this child as myself and my husband don't feel we can say anything to his sister about her son's behaviour - she is very sensitive and easily gets in a strop. In my own family we would communicate openly about this but my husband's family don't seem to communicate. I feel they already don't like me trying to be open with them (when I am assetive I am always kind and fair with it) but my in laws really have their head in the sand. Apart from the fact that this child is obviously an unhappy child and needs some help as he seems to have an emotional problem they just don't seem to see our point of view. My son doesn't complain about his awful behaviour toward him and does appear to like playing with him however my son is sensitive and is easily led and has abit of a low self- esteem (which we are trying to work on) so he wouldn't say much to him anyway. How can we encourage our son to not be so easily led and stick up for himself and has anyone got any furthers ideas to help? I would dearly love for us all to have a great relationship with our nephew but it is so hard when he is such an unpleasant child and his mother lets him get away with everything. I also find it so hard to communicate with a family so different from my own who sweep everything under the carpet.
Thanks for reading
Hiya,
i have quite similiar problem. My daughter's best friend is very controlling and bullying toward to my daughter. They have been together since my daughter moved to her friend school and are important to each other. I do value their friendship but her friend is soemtimes too much, bossies my daughter around all the time, even sometimes my daughter complains that her friend makes fun of her. I like her parents, they're very kind polite people and i don;t want their friendship ended because of it. I am in between lines now. I do not want to offend her and her parents but i don;t want my child to be bullied at the same time.
It would be much appreciated if anyone can help us.
Thanks a lot.
bayanaa
:fit:Hello eevans1,
In responce to your request, i dont think you can do much if you feel you are unable to tell your sister in law, how her son is with yours.
you could be making the situation worse. by feeling as you do because both your son and your nephew could pick up how you are feeling so they are going to be stressed before they even get there.
can your husband say something they are his parents after all.
if you feel the situation cant go on then you are going to have to say to your in laws that you dont feel you can visit when your nephew is there, because of how he treats your son.
you are stuck between the rock and the deep blue sea, but you cant go on its not fair on your children to have to suffer at the hands of a bully. hope this helps.
take care
:fit:Hello Bayanna,
i think this is something that is going to have to be stopped, if your daughter is being called names by the other girl, i would say that girl has problems, that need to be sorted out now, before she gets to an age where if she does it to sombody else, she could find herself in trouble.
try to speak to her parents, if they are aware then they can help.
take care