RE: Stressed Out
Hi Everyone
Sorry its been a while since I`ve been on. My situation is just getting worse and no -one can help me.
Its seems I just have to wait on him doing something when a witness is present. What they dont get is the fact he is able to harrass me using both the police and social work. The police continiously follow up his allegations with a visit to my home to check me out regardless of the fact that every time they come they can see immediately there is no problem with me or my kids. Then comes the letter from social work offering me help, so I explainthe history/background, they check their records find out he does this all the time.... Then it starts again with the big chap at the door regardless of time of day!
So far over the last 4 weeks he has reported me as being an unfit mother repeatedly, resulting in 5 visits from the police,andin this 4 week period I have had 3 letters from social work.
I`ve asked for help from Womens Aid, Police, Lawyer.
Womens Aid : They were`nt sure how "I" can get anything done about it, but suggested chatting to the Domestic Violence Officer at local police station. Or leave my home to go to a refuge...sorry been there done that (I fought long and hard to have the B****** removed to let me and my kids back home)
I do realise they provide a good source of help in some ways but I`m really upset today:(
Police : Absolute Crap!!!!!
Lawyer : Cant do anything without a witness!!
So I await the next big chap and get on the Merry-go-round again..
Or I wait for him to crack and come to get me. "Zero Tolerance" Its laughable no-one gives a monkeys till its too late.
RE: Stressed Out
Hi Arial
This is terrible, I can't believe that the different agencies you have contacted to get help and advice from have not been able to help at all. Its beyond me how, even now, people with the sort of mental health problems that can be classed as being threatening or violent, are still able to create havoc in other people's lives and the authorities don't bat an eyelid. In your situation, at the very least the police and social work department, who both have records of the continuous false allegations made by your ex, didn't bother following the allegations up and left you alone. It seems very one-sided because your ex doesn't get the same treatment.
I can understand why you are feeling so upset. No-one would be able to continue living this sort of hellish life for ever.
You mentioned in your first post that you were considering moving to get away from your ex-partner, since you have tried everything else this seems like a good option and the last resort.
If you moved away, would it be possible to keep your whereabouts from your ex, even if it meant severing all ties with friends in your current area? That way, if he hassles people to get your address or phone number, they simply won't have the information to give him.
I hope that you can remain as strong as you have been through all this and that you will get the chance to make your life peaceful. I'm so sorry you didn't get the help you should have got from the authorities. Take care.
Sandra
x
RE: Stressed Out
Hi Arial,
No wonder you feel so frustrated.But sometimes this is how it is. Nonetheless, there seems to be a distinct lack of effort by the professionals that should be helping you.Hang on in there and let us know how you are and what's happening. Let's hope that it goes your way soon.
Best wishes
Tucker
RE: Stressed Out
Hi Arial. I'm new here (this is only my 2nd post!) but I am hoping I may be able to help. In my 'real life' I am a domestic violence manager. Are you able to tell me which county you are in?
If you are where I am, I really really can help because there are LOTS of things you can do - but it depends on the set up in your county. (I'm in a midlands county.) However I do have lots of contacts with my counterparts in other parts of the country, so if you want any specific info please PM me and I will do what I can to help.
To be honest the sort of service you are describing is the sort of thing people like me are here to stop, through a co-ordinated approach. If someone came to me in my county with this story I would take it as a formal complaint and do something about it (at a high level too).
If I can help please contact me - it's things like this that my job role was created for.
Strength and positive thoughts coming your way.
Cx
RE: Stressed Out
Chrishta,
As Arial hasn't logged on for a couple of weeks it may be an idea to email her with your offer, as she may check her email more often.
Love and Reiki Hugs