Please dont be annoyed HP members with me as I always seem to be on here with problems of one sort or another but here goes.
My daughter seemed to be really happy with lots of friends and lots going for her but how wrong I was,
She has completed 2 years at Uni. and awaits her exam results at end of June.She managed to get some voluntary work at a fashion store learning the various business and marketing info.But over the last week or so I have seen a change in her,she is stressed,when walking she has her shoulders hunched up and her face looks stern,so I confronted her last night and alot came out,she feels like no one really likes her,her so called friends are not true loyal friends,there is a guy who is messing her about,she will not go outside the door unless she has make up on and all dressed up.She has been carrying all this with a good while but felt her father and I would be mad and not proud of her,
So we have a lot of work to do,I advised her to take a few days off,we are starting with EFT today,I will also do some Reiki and Reflexology.
I suppose what I am trying to say is that people can put on a brave face and try to please others and perhaps gain approval,Im so glad I have these tools to help her,at 19 you would think she would be care free but this has surprised me a little,anyhow it looks like lots of healing to be done,she was bullied at primary school but she had councelling,perhaps she still has remnants of this also 🙂
I think this is a lovely story. You have a relationship with your daughter whereby when push comes to shove she can tell you how she feels. And, you listen to her, and try and help. The suggestion to take a few days off is a good one. I've suffered terribly from stress and anxiety and just taking a couple of days off work to sleep in, slowly prepare nice food and loll about - does help. If she is doing that in a loving home environment, and receiving treatments... and sharing her thoughts with you... well, I think the outcome will be a positive one. As well as having loving parents she is very lucky that you have these therapies at your fingertips.
I'd not be too worried that you're only finding out about this now. I admire her for trying to resolve her problems by her own resources, before asking for help. You've got a brave young woman there.
You sound like a lovely parent.
Ava x
Hi Star
Please give your daughter a hug from me. I am now 30 and would never go back to being that age. I think the expectation that you should be young care free and having a great time adds to the burden if this time isn't easy. I turned 30 with a sigh of relief!
I think its great that you have so many tools to help your daughter with but I would also encourge you to give her some space and encourage her to find out what she wants and how she wants to deal with it. Don't get me wrong - throw everything you have into the melting pot but make her feel as though you are just the facilitator rather than the one with the answers........ My parents let me know that i was still loved by them and that i was safe and that was more important to my healing than anything else.
Sending much love and light to the situation I really feel for your daughter - let her know she is not alone. As one of my friends said the other day - you never see an unhappy face on facebook. So much of life around that time is about keeping up appearances I think its great that you are providing a safe space for her not to have to do that anymore.
Hugs all round
Sunbeamx
I think this is a lovely story. You have a relationship with your daughter whereby when push comes to shove she can tell you how she feels. And, you listen to her, and try and help. The suggestion to take a few days off is a good one. I've suffered terribly from stress and anxiety and just taking a couple of days off work to sleep in, slowly prepare nice food and loll about - does help. If she is doing that in a loving home environment, and receiving treatments... and sharing her thoughts with you... well, I think the outcome will be a positive one. As well as having loving parents she is very lucky that you have these therapies at your fingertips.
I'd not be too worried that you're only finding out about this now. I admire her for trying to resolve her problems by her own resources, before asking for help. You've got a brave young woman there.
You sound like a lovely parent.
Ava x
Yes Ava,we do have a good relationship overall,she needs time out at moment,we are working away and lots of repressed tears,Ive also included agrimony (hiding behind a brave face),and you are correct she has been brave 🙂
Hi Star
Please give your daughter a hug from me. I am now 30 and would never go back to being that age. I think the expectation that you should be young care free and having a great time adds to the burden if this time isn't easy. I turned 30 with a sigh of relief!
I think its great that you have so many tools to help your daughter with but I would also encourge you to give her some space and encourage her to find out what she wants and how she wants to deal with it. Don't get me wrong - throw everything you have into the melting pot but make her feel as though you are just the facilitator rather than the one with the answers........ My parents let me know that i was still loved by them and that i was safe and that was more important to my healing than anything else.
Sending much love and light to the situation I really feel for your daughter - let her know she is not alone. As one of my friends said the other day - you never see an unhappy face on facebook. So much of life around that time is about keeping up appearances I think its great that you are providing a safe space for her not to have to do that anymore.
Hugs all round
Sunbeamx
Hi Sunbeam thanks for the hug,it is a hard time and Im glad I can help her,she knows we love her and as you say that is so important,true about facebook so the agrimonly again should bring things into perspective 🙂
A question for the EFT professionals,we have been tapping on the feelings this guy brings up for my daughter,and we were making good progress until I see her texting him.So if I use psychological reverse therapy should we be saying 'Even though I have to text him .....,a little confused here,is this the correct way to re direct the energy,:confused: