Hi, I am new here...Hello everyone.
I am currently learning massage therapy, I have already completed a short massage course, and am now studying for NVQ.
My question is this.. is is ok to only see female clients? or will this be seen as sexist? this has been worrying me quite a bit... my fear is for 2 reasons, firstly, my cousin is a massage therapist (of 12 years) and said in her experience most men sooner or later try it on in one way or another, and secondly I will be working alone on a self employed basis, so this will also be for security reasons.
I have 1-2 massages per week, at various establishments and would never feel comfortable with a male carrying out the massage,the same applies with me being the giver of the massage.
I overheard a worrying conversation whilst on my massage course, basically there was 1 guy on the course, he was on the phone to he's friend stating the only reason he was learning massage was to touch ladies beautiful bodies,and that he would act professional whilst giving the massage but would be thinking sexy thoughts!!! this made me feel very uneasy and annoyed, but I do not like confrontation so I didn't let him know I had heard. When it came to partner time nobody wanted to go with him, as we all felt uneasy touching a man.
Sorry about the long post, I am finding the male client/therapist thing quite overwhelming at the moment.
Many thanks in advance for any advice. Rebecca
Hi Rebecca,
yes it is perfectly acceptable to only offer massage to females, and a lot of working therapists do that, even ones with a lot of experience.
State on your advertising FEMALE CLIENTS ONLY. your safety comes first, and at the end of the day, you go into self employment to please yourself.
But, what concerns me is what your cousin says, she has made me feel uncomfortable with that comment.
When I was mobile I only went to female houses, if after a few appointments they asked if I would also massage their partner then I would.
Now I rent rooms, 1/3 of my clients are male, they generally book in for massage or reflexology. I've not once had an uncomfortable experience with any of my male clients, and some I have seen every month for the past 3 years.
What you won't be protected from is people ringing you up asking what "services you provide".
Re: your overhead conversation, he may well have been blagging it! We all say things to our mates which we would cringe if anyone else heard our conversation. Unless your intuition/gut feeling is screaming out that he's a pervert, I would give the guy a chance.
Thanks for the reply, I have just started reading other threads in this section and have noticed another therapist is having the same problems as my cousin, thread titled 'quick rant'
I am not overly concerned about this issue, I will just see female clients, and I am pleased other therapists are already doing so,-I wont look like an old fashioned prune, even though I am only 26! 😉
Hi Rebecca,
as guruholistics says, as a self employed therapist you can choose which clients you want to see.
We have recently discussed male clients (from a female perspective), and in my opinion, if you were going to visit clients in their homes, then you should stick to same sex, for safety reasons, however most of the 'dodgy' clients dont usually get past the telephone vetting, but you wont stop them from trying.
And again, I wouldnt be put off your course by one persons bravado....i have trained over a thousand people in massage therapies, and believe me, ive heard it all...from both sexes, and it has always been lighthearted, however...if you do feel uncomfortable, have a private word with your tutor who will be able to monitor anything.
Good luck with your training.
Hi RebeccaLondon
After reading your post on this and other threads your concerns about practising on men, but just because there is a few perv's around doesn't mean that us men all want extras.
As a teacher and therapist I have often overheard female students talk about how they only wish to treat hunky men - but that of course is just girlie talk.
But on a much more serious note, I know of a case where a female student started fancying a female tutor. She ended up stalking the tutor and made her life a living hell.
Life isn't as black and white as you have seem to paint. You have got to do what's right for you and be safe, but don't tar and feather every bloke out there. You may be missing out on many genuine clients.
Best Wishes
RP