long term recurring dream - torment

Hi,

I was wondering if anyone could help me with a recurring dream I have. I have had this ever since i was about 14 - I am now 32.

The start of the dream is that I am wearing a pale blue wedding dress - the English style of wedding dress, veil, long dress, elaborate etc - but pale blue. I am mostly looking down at my feet - I have matching shoes.

There is someone to my right who is holding my arm, firmly but gently and walking me towards a church in a local town to me. This is odd as I am not Christian so would unlikely be marrying in a church.

I walk into the church, i feel calm but odd and wrong but sort of giving in feeling. As i look up I see two men to the top right, one looks around and smiles. he is handsome and blonde but he fills me with horror and I wriggle free, turn and run. At this point the dream becomes panicky and frightening. As i run my veil and shoes fall off and I run barefoot through the town - allt hrough roads that are familiar to me and I am looking for friends but as i reach their houses I remember they will mostly be at my wedding.

In the dream i find my feet are hurting and sore from runnign on roads without shoes and I have twisted my ankle - I run until I get outside the toan and end up running in some woods and then in a stream where my feet and my brain feel a bit better.

Does anyone know why I still have this dream?

it is distressing - I wake up feeling so bad. Also i have a lot of trouble sleeping anyway - a lot of bad dreams, waking up- sometiems I wake up screaming. often i don't realsie this as I am still asleep but now my partner is living with me he obviously notices.

The dream i described is just one of many - but this one is powerful and have never left me.

Any ideas - I would be grateful if you can help me,

hal