Hello all
My husband has been suffering from a sore penis after intercourse and it has become more of a problem in the past 2 years. He is not overly keen to discuss it so I thought I'd put a question out to see if anyone else has experienced this and what steps we could take. In the past he would occasionally get soreness there with small 'tears' in his foreskin but this was not often, however over the years I believe his foreskin has become tighter and it is not so easy to slide the foreskin back over the head of the penis. In fact now it is nearly impossible to retract it fully over the base of the head. I guess there are 2 parts to this in that for one he has soreness and that in itself is an issue as it sometimes prevents us having intercourse. Also over time I also think he has not been able to 'last as long' as it were - something I think is to do with the foreskin not retracting easily - I think that this could be over stimulating the head and bringing him to climax prematurely. I have done some reading on the subject and have read about 'phimosis' which is a very tight foreskin which seems to be rather more extreme that my husband's case but similar in that ultimately it is a problem. In such cases men can be circumcised to overcome it. I am beginning to wonder whether circumcision might be the solution for us but obviously this can not be undertaken lightly and of course would be a big thing for my husband. Also, I am also aware that such a course would be visibly very different and again there may be implications there too - having only seen a circumcised man on the internet I know the reality might be a little different.
Anyway, enough of my waffling and anxiety - I'd really appreciate some help and advice and maybe to hear from anyone whose partner has gone through this. By the way, my husband in now 34.
Cheers, Lou x :confused:
Hiya
I don't have any personal experience, but a friend of mine had the op about 25 years ago when he was in his 30s, with no subsequent problems. I imagine these days it's probably a day surgery job and about as problematic as a vasectomy.
Hope this helps
interesting - I'd love to get to speak to a couple that have been through this too. Did he have the operation due to tightness of the foreskin?
interesting - I'd love to get to speak to a couple that have been through this too. Did he have the operation due to tightness of the foreskin?
Yes I understand he was having problems.
one of my friends (26) had this done a few weeks ago. he was "out of action" for a few weeks now but said he was never in any pain (well since anyway!) and it has been nothing but a positive experience!
Hi Lou,
I had a similar experience with my ex-husband, and he ended up having to have a circumcision - if you have any questions please feel free to ask via pm and I'll do my best to answer based on our experience.
With love,
Amber
I think your hubby should get this sorted out - if the foreskin cannot be retracted, he cannot wash beneath it properly, and this could well lead to infection.
Hi Lou,
A friend of mine had this done due to the very reasons you mention and so had the op.
From what I understand the op itself is pretty straight forward, the worst bit being the injections to numb the area.
He said he was out of action for a few weeks and had quite a few painful experiences due to swelling and problematic erections at night time while the stiches healed.
If it needs doing though, it needs doing!
Hi lou,
I hope the op goes well, and it gets sorted.
In connection with this, there is a lot of debate about the ethics of male circumsision at an early age - some say that the Jewish/Islamic custom is a barbaric practice that should be banned, others argue that it's a good thing on hyginic grounds alone.
I was circumsized as a child - I remember it well, I was around 4 or so, living in Kashmir. The kids i used to play with told me that someone was gonna come to cut of my willy, so I should run for it....
The man came that afternoon and told me to sit on an upside down basket that we sometimes used to trap chickens in. He told me to look to the side, then did the circumsision in seconds - presumably that was his job, and he was expert at it. They put lots of herbs and things on me, and told me not to itch it or play with it (!), and it soon cleared up....
I feel that circumsision makes more blood flow to the area, leads to more focus on it, hence more exploration of sexuality, less sensitivity, etc, as compared to if the organ is left alone and covered.
hi all and thanks for the feedback.
By tears I mean rips - breaks in the skin. He saw a Gp a while back who told him to moisturize it and that was it. He can retract the skin when his penis is soft - no problems but when erect he can barely retract it over the coronal ridge as it is tight. We had a chat and he has been doing some research also and has doscivered a thing called a Preputioplasty which is an op which aims to loosen the foreskin http://www.london-urology.co.uk/preputial%20plasty.htm and seems to be a legit work around. Does anyone have experience of this procedure? I have now spoken with him at length and he wants to sort the whole thing out and stop worrying about it and he says he is not totally adverse to a circumcision if necessary....
Any further views welcome. Our next step is to get a referral to a specialist from the GP - lets hope we come to an agreed course to resolve the issue.
Lou x
Phimosis is usually caused by putting too much pressure on the penis. The penis is made up of 3 spongy arteries. If they are damaged they collapse and do not fill up with blood properly. The glans of the penis is attached to the artery along the bottom of the penis. As the penis fills with blood it pushes the glans through the skin. Obviously if it is damaged, it cannot do that.
It can be remedied by giving it time to rest. If it is in use and you continue to apply too much pressure then you are just un-doing the repair or even damaging it even more.
Has he always had trouble retracting it? Usually this problem starts in puberty while masturbating . Boys who develop this condition tend to masturbate in ways that apply too much pressure. Such as thrusting against the matress. Or sitting at the desk watching porn and pushing down on the erect penis through clothes.
Unfortunately most GP's, even urlogists just tell you to get a circumcision. Circucmsion is bad because the foreskin is an important part of the penis. It contains many nerves on it's underside. When the foreskin is moved up and down it is very pleasurable. Circumcised men have lost this ability as there is no gliding effect. So they have to use artificial lubrication to masturbate or even in sex.
Without the foreskin protecting the glans, circumcised men lose further sensitivity. The glans dries out. It also brushes on underwear causing the skin to toughen. The foreskin also has a role in sex. Women and men enjoy sex more when the man still has his foreskin.
Unfortunately most GP's, even urlogists just tell you to get a circumcision. Circucmsion is bad because the foreskin is an important part of the penis. It contains many nerves on it's underside. When the foreskin is moved up and down it is very pleasurable. Circumcised men have lost this ability as there is no gliding effect. So they have to use artificial lubrication to masturbate or even in sex.
Without the foreskin protecting the glans, circumcised men lose further sensitivity. The glans dries out. It also brushes on underwear causing the skin to toughen. The foreskin also has a role in sex.
I wouldn't say that circumsision is bad because it leads to a decreease in sensitivity, rather that this could be a good thing. Men and women have different arousal patterns, men tend to get a quick errection, and because of the high sensitivity in the penis they will orgasm/ejaculate quickly. Women, on the other hand tend to be much more slow to arouse, and will take londger to reach orgasm.
Women and men enjoy sex more when the man still has his foreskin.
Do women enjoy sex more with a foreskiin?
I don't know - personally, I don't have a foreskin, and I find sex enjoyable, but then I don't have anything to compare against!
Hi! I have to say that I have had two husbands, one circumcised, one not. I would go for the uncircumcised choice any day of the week if there is a choice to be had. Your husband may not have the choice and health is more important. At the end of the day, it is the bloke we fall for not the willy!
On the positive side it seemingly lowers the women's risk of getting cervical cancer.
According to a recent study circumcision also lessens the chance of contracting HIV
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/4371384.stm
Binah
x