Notifications
Clear all

Alcohol

Page 1 / 2

bertramfinks
Posts: 5
Topic starter
(@bertramfinks)
Active Member
Joined: 10 years ago

Hi folks. There is something quite cathartic about spilling your inner most to people you don't know. So here goes. I have been drinking heavily for about 15 years now and hiding it well. Very well in fact as i work in the fitness industry and mental health services. I have recently tried to go cold turkey and managed 2 days. I felt bloody awful, irritable, anxious, shakes and headaches. I know why i drink and stopping drinking made the reasons stand out more. We addicts all have reasons why we do what we do. So, how do you defeat them? The drink is the easy bit really.

36 Replies
Tashanie
Posts: 1924
(@tashanie)
Noble Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Hi folks. There is something quite cathartic about spilling your inner most to people you don't know. So here goes. I have been drinking heavily for about 15 years now and hiding it well. Very well in fact as i work in the fitness industry and mental health services. I have recently tried to go cold turkey and managed 2 days. I felt bloody awful, irritable, anxious, shakes and headaches. I know why i drink and stopping drinking made the reasons stand out more. We addicts all have reasons why we do what we do. So, how do you defeat them? The drink is the easy bit really.

I was married to someone who had a major alcohol problem - and now I am a hypnotherapist trying to help people with similar problems to yours.

I am also a pharmacist and I can tell you going cold turkey is dangerous. So don't. Admit you need help and go to your GP. Because you cannot defeat it alone.

You are an intelligent man. You know that your behaviour is self destructive. And my guess is the thoughts that drive the behaviour are just as self destructive.

That is what you need to deal with . If you were sitting in my therapy chair I would ask you all sorts of questions. But you are not and I cannot second guess what we would find out if you were my patient. But I know that together we would identify the destructive thought patterns and find strategies to change them. It can be done. but you need to spill those innermost thoughts to a professional who can help you sort them out.

You are right - the drinking is the easy bit. But if you really WANT to stop drinking you can with appropriate professional help.

Good luck

Reply
bertramfinks
Posts: 5
Topic starter
(@bertramfinks)
Active Member
Joined: 10 years ago

You are right. The thoughts that drive the drinking are just as bad in a way. Drinking masks them and when you don't drink they are there in glorious Technicolour.

Reply
CarolineN
Posts: 4760
(@carolinen)
Famed Member
Joined: 13 years ago

You are right. The thoughts that drive the drinking are just as bad in a way. Drinking masks them and when you don't drinkthey are there in glorious Technicolour.

You might like to have a look at . And do look at the videos on the main site - watch the clients' faces to see the change in them.

There is help out there, but it takes courage to seek it out, and you have already done that by posting on here - so the next step is ...

Wishing you all the best.

Oh, and it might be useful to start taking a quality general vitamin and mineral supplement like [url]this one[/url], but your best bet to get your body better balanced physically is to see a [url]registered nutritional therapist[/url] who will assess exactly what you need.

Reply
Masha B
Posts: 1006
(@masha-b)
Noble Member
Joined: 17 years ago

I know why i drink and stopping drinking made the reasons stand out more. We addicts all have reasons why we do what we do. So, how do you defeat them? The drink is the easy bit really.

It's good news that you know the reasons for your drinking (many people don't and think that it is the alcohol or another substance that's the main problem - but in reality it is an attempt at a solution, however damaging it may be).

Do be really careful with the way you try to cut down on your drinking - going cold Turkey can be very dangerous, please do get medical help to detox properly if you want to stop again. In my experience as a psychotherapist (I have a specialist interest in addictions) it isn't enough to cut down on or stop the addictive substance - unless the underlying issues are addressed people tend to move from one addiction to another, e.g. from heroin to alcohol, from cocaine to compulsive sex or gambling, from cigarettes to sweets etc. As you know why you drink it is a really good start and if you can get the support to help address those challenges in your life you'll be well on your way to recovery.

There are lots of helpful websites and sources of support, but I do like this one especially [url]Empowering people to tackle substance use problems - Wired In (Wired Initiative)[/url]. It can be really difficult to face recovery on your own, so do ask for help from friends and family (if you can), and find a health professional whom you could trust.

Best of luck

Reply
Nell Ellison
Posts: 4
(@nell-ellison)
New Member
Joined: 10 years ago

I would also advise seeking professional advice.There are evidenced based psychological therapies for alcohol dependence. See [url]National Treatment Agency for Substance Misuse - Clinical Guidance[/url] for more details.
Kind regards,
Nell

Reply
kndge9584
Posts: 2
(@kndge9584)
New Member
Joined: 10 years ago

alcohol is a very dangerous for our body. this makes a man very harmfulness

Reply
phillywilly
Posts: 1
(@phillywilly)
New Member
Joined: 10 years ago

hi there , going cold turkey IS very dangerous , due a doctor i wouldnt reccomend to my worst enemy i had a couple of fits/seizures ,which i know now could have been fatal .
im 35 have ADHD therefore at nights i find im wearing 5 thinking caps !! lol, and due to this final straw with my gp i changed to another gp with hospitals advice .
i started off drinking a few beers to relax+switch off at night ,which got more+more as the demon drink does ! ( got 2 a point where id drink a bottle of vodka or rum a night ! ) , anyway i cut right bk down to a few beers for obvious health reasons .

to cut this short ,i travel+party alot with work ,free drink+invites to clubs 😮 , a month ago had a mad 4 days ,free champaigne wine rum u name it ,i was like gazza ! ended up in a+e severly de-hydrated+gasstronitis (excuse the spelling) ,released nxt day+told strongly to go to my gp + get meds to stop shaking ect , docs orders where " sweat it out my boy ,drugs wont help " ? so i did , hence bk in a+e the night after with a fit .
morale o the story DONT GO COLD TURKEY cut down as much as u can untill you get prof advice+help , the hypnosis lady sounds good ,might look into that myself .as i still have active mind adhd issue , but dont harldly drink anymore . good luck .
phill.

Reply
bertramfinks
Posts: 5
Topic starter
(@bertramfinks)
Active Member
Joined: 10 years ago

I win

I've beaten it. Three months and counting. Thanks for the advice.

Reply
lerry
Posts: 9
(@lerry)
Active Member
Joined: 9 years ago

I can understand your feeling. It feels really bad when you do not find alcohol and it makes mad. I will strongly suggest you that you can not draw yourself at once out of this habit. Just try to reduce the amount you drink and reduce it steadily.

Reply
romeo78
Posts: 4
(@romeo78)
New Member
Joined: 8 years ago

I think far too often we focus on the issue at hand (the alcohol abuse) rather than the underlying issue. It seems that you have a grasp on the fact that you need to treat the underlying problem before you will see any changes.

Keep in mind though that just the physical act of alcohol detoxification is horrendous and not recommended to do on your own. We are all proud of your three months!

Reply
Tashanie
Posts: 1924
(@tashanie)
Noble Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Wise words Romeo! The post you are replying to is nearly a year old tho. it would be wonderful to know how Bertram is doing now. Maybe he will see this thread and give us an update

Reply
Brian Jones
Posts: 112
(@brian-jones)
Estimable Member
Joined: 8 years ago

I have a major problem dealing on alcohol too. Almost every single night, I’ve just been getting drunk. It was fun, yes, and no doubt about it. But it brings me many negative effects every time I passed out due to heavy drinking. It affects my family as well. I don’t want to this anymore, but every time I’ll try to stop I always get bored or an itch to do it and the next thing I knew, I’m back on my bad habit. It’s bringing me down. I know overcoming to this addiction can be a long and bumpy road. At times, I feel impossible. My maternal grandparents were both alcoholics, so if alcoholism being influenced by heredity, I’m probably tagged. I’m planning to consider going cold turkey. But they said it is dangerous and prove fatal. 🙁

I win

I've beaten it. Three months and counting. Thanks for the advice.

I envy you for that. How I hope I can beat this struggle too. 🙁

Reply
Tashanie
Posts: 1924
(@tashanie)
Noble Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Please do NOT just go cold Turkey Brian. it could be dangerous. Addiction is not inherited.....but what you can inherit is the tendency to become addicted. Also what can be inherited die to environmental and social factors is thought patterns and an approach to life to causes dependency on alcohol (or indeed any other substance) My late ex husband had massive alcohol problems. My son drinks very moderately.

You can take charge of your own life and your own thoughts......but you need some expert help. Please in the first instance go and see your GP or practise nurse. They can check you out and advise you if you can in fact just stop......which would be great. However 'just stopping' needs you to change your thoughts about alcohol, yourself, your life.......all the factors which lead you to drink too much......and counselling or hypnotherapy or CBT could be very helpful. Your GP may be able to signpost you to appropriate services.

You are not a bad or weak person because you have a problem with alcohol.....and you can beat this. Feel free to PM me if you would like to talk

Reply
Crowan
Posts: 3429
(@crowan)
Famed Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Addiction can also be 'inherited' through soul loss.

Reply
Brian Jones
Posts: 112
(@brian-jones)
Estimable Member
Joined: 8 years ago

You are not a bad or weak person because you have a problem with alcohol.....and you can beat this. Feel free to PM me if you would like to talk

Thank you so much for your response. 🙂 I know, I can beat this dilemma, right now, still searching a solution. I’ll will definitely give you a bip :). In spite of this I’m glad that there is someone like you that understand my situation. 🙂

Reply
Tashanie
Posts: 1924
(@tashanie)
Noble Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Addiction can also be 'inherited' through soul loss.

Do you mean that because an ancestor suffered soul loss you are more likely to? Can you explain? And would dealing with the soul loss automatically deal with the addiiction?

Reply
Crowan
Posts: 3429
(@crowan)
Famed Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Do you mean that because an ancestor suffered soul loss you are more likely to? Can you explain? And would dealing with the soul loss automatically deal with the addiiction?

Not automatically, but it would put the person concerned in a stronger place to overcome the addiction - it would still need working on.

When I said "inherited", I didn't necessarily mean in a direct family line, although that can happen. There are two main ways.
When something happens - let's say, in this case, a child grows up with an alcoholic parent/carer (or anyone else close to them). This is a hard thing to deal with and causes soul loss in the child. The part that goes (because soul loss has evolved as a survival technique) is the part least able to deal with alcoholism. This means that the part that is left is more inured to alcoholism - he/she finds it more acceptable to them.
Exactly the same happens with any type of abuse.
The other way is rarer, but does happen - an intrusion which lives on the fear, despair or even on the alcohol itself, has got into the family line and will move from one generation to the next (or the next but one) in order to keep the food supply coming.

Reply
Tashanie
Posts: 1924
(@tashanie)
Noble Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Thank you Crowan. Your explanations of shamanism always fascinate me... and I can understand what you mean in this case. I see the effects of my exes alcoholism in my son.....although he has found other ways to protect himself apart from alcohol.

Reply
Brian Jones
Posts: 112
(@brian-jones)
Estimable Member
Joined: 8 years ago

I managed not to drink liquor 2 days in a row. But, I still can’t resist the craving for cigarettes, even for an hour. Sad, makes me depressed. Worst, last night, my friend visited me and we took 2 to 3 cans of beer while reminiscing. Oh men……..i just can’t avoid alcohol, even though my mind says no, my body continues acting like it’s not mine.

Reply
Crowan
Posts: 3429
(@crowan)
Famed Member
Joined: 12 years ago

These are major addictions. Get help - don't try to do everything by yourself.

Reply
Tashanie
Posts: 1924
(@tashanie)
Noble Member
Joined: 12 years ago

I managed not to drink liquor 2 days in a row. But, I still can’t resist the craving for cigarettes, even for an hour. Sad, makes me depressed. Worst, last night, my friend visited me and we took 2 to 3 cans of beer while reminiscing. Oh men……..i just can’t avoid alcohol, even though my mind says no, my body continues acting like it’s not mine.

Brian you developed both habits over a long periods of time....and it is not reasonable to expect to be able to break them both in a short period of time. In reality you need to deal with the issues that drive your addiction as part if the whole process. Do please go and see your GP for help with BOTH problems......

Your conscious mind is saying no....your unconscious mind is saying yes.....and thats why it is so hard to stop. The good news is your unconscious can be tamed and brought on side to say on no.......but it takes time and therapy of some sort.

Reply
Brian Jones
Posts: 112
(@brian-jones)
Estimable Member
Joined: 8 years ago

These are major addictions. Get help - don't try to do everything by yourself.

Yeah. I’m screwed. Big time. Thanks for the reply! 🙂

Reply
Brian Jones
Posts: 112
(@brian-jones)
Estimable Member
Joined: 8 years ago

Brian you developed both habits over a long periods of time....and it is not reasonable to expect to be able to break them both in a short period of time. In reality you need to deal with the issues that drive your addiction as part if the whole process. Do please go and see your GP for help with BOTH problems......

Your conscious mind is saying no....your unconscious mind is saying yes.....and thats why it is so hard to stop. The good news is your unconscious can be tamed and brought on side to say on no.......but it takes time and therapy of some sort.

I’m considering going to meetings now, AA. I hope it will do well for me :). Thank you Tashanie, thank you for hearing me out. 🙂

Need love guys.

Reply
bertramfinks
Posts: 5
Topic starter
(@bertramfinks)
Active Member
Joined: 10 years ago

I started this thread but never managed to keep my start at stopping. It was always knocking at the door and slowly crept back in and due to a physical injury I've ended up adding to it all with very strong pain relief. Doh!! If you don't defeat the demons it won go away. I know that now, but the demons are still there.

Reply
Tashanie
Posts: 1924
(@tashanie)
Noble Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Bertran I am so sorry to hear this. Have you had any professional help to try and deal with the demons? They CAN be dealt with....all demons can....but sadly there is no magic bullet that can just make them vanish over night.

Reply
Crowan
Posts: 3429
(@crowan)
Famed Member
Joined: 12 years ago

I started this thread but never managed to keep my start at stopping. It was always knocking at the door and slowly crept back in and due to a physical injury I've ended up adding to it all with very strong pain relief. Doh!! If you don't defeat the demons it won go away. I know that now, but the demons are still there.

It isn't an "all or nothing". You can try again. What help and support do you have at home? Is the physical injury still a problem?

Do you remember when Sally said to Brian:

Brian you developed both habits over a long periods of time....and it is not reasonable to expect to be able to break them both in a short period of time.

You could take those words for yourself. Changing takes time and effort - don't consider you have failed simply because you have not managed to break this habit YET.

Reply
bertramfinks
Posts: 5
Topic starter
(@bertramfinks)
Active Member
Joined: 10 years ago

Physical injury is still a problem. I will beat this one day. I've got to face up to things from my past which I'm not strong enough to do so. The addictions make them go away for a time.

Reply
Gilbo
Posts: 33
(@gilbo)
Eminent Member
Joined: 8 years ago

I've been 3 years sober from alcohol addiction. It's difficult and I struggle a lot and feel all the pain, butwhen you get succeed everything you do is worth it

Reply
Crowan
Posts: 3429
(@crowan)
Famed Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Physical injury is still a problem. I will beat this one day. I've got to face up to things from my past which I'm not strong enough to do so. The addictions make them go away for a time.

If the physical injury is painful, get your doctor to refer you to a pain clinic. Tell him/her that it causes you to drink too much. My partner has, finally, been referred. Saying, "it hurts", "it hurts a lot" and "I can't believe how much it hurts" had little effect. Saying, "I'm taking double the dose of painkillers and washing them down with whisky" got an immediate response.

Reply
Page 1 / 2
Share: