I have always have a suspicion that many people die the death they choose. Natural disasters being an exception, I suppose. Of course I'm not sure, you can never prove this, but I do regularly get this impression. Anyway ....
I have a preference for my own death. I hope to grow older and wiser, and then, when I've finally had enough, just to lie down in my own bed and stop eating. The Jains in India have a practice called sallekhana, ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sallekhana ) whereby they do just that.
In fact, that's what I am living towards very very slowly. I'm 68 and happy now, but I like the idea of working towards: getting wiser and calmer and wiser and calmer and so on. I am not very wise and even less calm now, but I meditate every day and that helps a tiny bit.
My father always had the wish to end it, when old, by walking into the back of the garden, lying down and letting the leaves gradually cover him up. In fact he was very happy to be able to commit euthanasia, at 88, being Dutch.
What do you think about this - if at all?
What a lucky man!
My father is 90 and an invalid and everyday for the last 6 years he has wished to die but the medications and physicians in the UK keep keeping him alive!
I think (with regards to the other thread) it is important to consider those left behind and those that pur death may affect, like the lorry driver or the train driver or the person that find the body, or that has to clear up the mess.
I think assisted dying is a difficult topic. Sir Terry Pratchett managed to have almost his perfect death and I am sure that has been some comfort to his family. I dread developing dementia and putting my husband and son through the pain of losing me years before I actually die.
My father is 90 and an invalid and everyday for the last 6 years he has wished to die but the medications and physicians in the UK keep keeping him alive!
Shame on them!
I've made a 'living will', and hope that will help in such a case.
Does he have to accept the medications and interference? Can't he say "I want nothing"? Or do they threaten with terrible pains etc. if he refuses?
Although I also had an aunt in her nineties who was in hospital a few years ago and told everyone she did not want to eat anymore. And then the nurse came along and offered her lunch. "I don't want anything" said my aunt. "What about some lovely custard, we've just made some?"
"OK then" said my aunt, and lived on quite happily for a few more years. It was just posturing in here case, so people would feel sorry for her.
Anne Mary - With age comes the decline in the physical body, so to equate ageing just with being wise is not the full, realistic picture.
Currently my mother is very close to death. She has dementia (amongst other problems) and it is a fine line between keeping her pain free but not giving her sufficient pain killers to curb her alertness. If she is not alert enough it affects her ability to eat/swallow (dementia impacts on swallowing ability). She has said she doesn't want to be here anymore...but that has been when she is in pain. Her mental state is such that it no longer gives her accurate info about her body. For instance, when asked if she wants the fan on, she may say no but, if the fan is put on, you can sense the immediate relief it gives her. Palliative care is a difficult procedure to get right and we are close to that stage with her now, i.e. just administering painkillers but with no further medical interventions to sustain her life with that added help. I am glad not to have to shoulder this decision on my own, since I have a brother and sister.
As for myself, about dying. My one fear is not having full mental faculties. I could cope with physical limitations but to lose the ability to think as I currently can scares me. It's a difficult call. I almost drowned once - undercurrents in the Meditteranean (never knew of such a thing). Once it is accepted, drowning is a very pleasant way to go...like lying back in the bath...with the sound of the ocean in your ears.
In a comfortable haze of diamorphine surrounded by pretty nurses in a hospice. 😀
In a comfortable haze of diamorphine surrounded by pretty nurses in a hospice. 😀
I hope not to need diamorphine. But I have to say hospice care is excellent. And to be fair when my mother-in-law died the elderly care ward she was on were excellent.
Shame on them!
I've made a 'living will', and hope that will help in such a case.
Does he have to accept the medications and interference? Can't he say "I want nothing"? Or do they threaten with terrible pains etc. if he refuses?
Any patient has the right to refuse any medication if they have the capacity to make an informed decision.
Sometimes they may be persuaded by relatives who they don't want to upset by seeming to give up. And pain can be horrific so I can think of no sane reason why anyone would refuse pain medication at the end of life.But analgesics don't keep people alive.
In fact I cannot think of many medications that actively keep people alive. Insulin for type 1 diabetics, adrenaline pens for anaphylaxis, dialysis drugs
I won't die I if I stop my taking thyroxine or my vitamin D....but I will have a pretty miserable life!
I seem to remember that recently read drowning is a very painful way to go, but I may have it wrong. I think that was in ice cold water, rather than the mediterranean.
I though dying in fire was the most painful way, and dying by drowning was meant to be the least painful; kind of like falling asleep. So they say.
Makes you wonder who decides these things - 'So, last week I died in a fire. This week I'll drown, then I'll come back and tell you which was better.' :confused:
I though dying in fire was the most painful way, and dying by drowning was meant to be the least painful; kind of like falling asleep. So they say.
the intial breathing in of water burns like hell it is agony, then there is the panic, the realisation that this is the end.. then I got pulled out and it hurt even more going back to breathing air.
Not drowning for me, once was enough! Burning must hurt even more, think of a tiny burn from an oven?
I think that a drugs overdose might be k, something like sleeping pills and morphine mix, but it has to be the right amount so it works.
Oh My God, what do I sound like???
the intial breathing in of water burns like hell it is agony, then there is the panic, the realisation that this is the end.. then I got pulled out and it hurt even more going back to breathing air.
Not drowning for me, once was enough! Burning must hurt even more, think of a tiny burn from an oven?I think that a drugs overdose might be k, something like sleeping pills and morphine mix, but it has to be the right amount so it works.
Oh My God, what do I sound like???
Ah...interesting....I guess my drowning had not got to that stage then so I will amend my appraisal of drowning being pleasant (once it is accepted/i.e. no longer struggling).
I was floating and didn't realise that there were such things as undercurrents. I got out of my depth, i.e. found I suddenly could not touch the sea bed and panicked. I am a poor swimmer. I did get the life highlights bit (showing like a fast movie) but I don't recall breathing in water....just as well since I have a lung disorder. My sister saved me (she had life saving skills) leaving the useless, dozy lifesaver still on the beach watching as she manoeuvred me to the shoreline.
I think it may be different for everyone? I was hit by a wave and tumbled over and over and didn't know which way was up any more, completely underwater unable to see through the murky sandy water. Luckily the beach had lifeguards on duty and they weren't dozy lol.
Perhaps you were bobbing around on the top swallowing water?