Needing a nudge...

[Mystacoll]

Hey people. i'm a new member here. I have come to this site with a little question needing answering, which may lead to many more questions but could perhaps answer a lot. Confused? hmmm so am i...
Basically, i have been interested in wicca and pagan beliefs for a a good 10 or so years,and have dabbled in many differant things. But i have never been initiated into anything. i once nearly went to a few things and contacted the pagan federation, but the bottom line is im a busy guy who doesnt have a lot of time to travel all the time...i was wondering if anyone knew of any local covens or groups near blandford in dorset? i have recently got engaged and would love a wedding that is a bit more real than singing songs i dont know about a guy who is deabateable of ever existing. Plus Christianity is more or less based on pagan beliefs anyway, and i dont really want a business deal type of wedding in a registry office where we turn up hand over some money scribble our names down and Bob's your uncle...But i believe to actually have a wiccan or pagan wedding i first need to initialise into a group or coven...i could be wrong so please forgive me if i am...this is not the sole reason for wanting to be intialised though...its something ive thought about for years... it would be good to actually have a picture to follow whilst doing the jigsaw puzzle, rather than trying to figure out what the whole picture is without help, if you know what i mean!!!

I would be eternally grateful for any ideas, or any nudges...

Mystacoll

[Mountaineer]

Hello Mystacoll. Welcome to Healthypages!

As I see it our destiny is shaped by the deeds we do, for good or ill. This is the important thing.
As I'm not of that faith I can't help you, but there are a few here who are, try the Paganism and Wicca sub-sections in the Religion & Faiths section.

[meadowsweet]

Merry Meet Mystacol,

Welcome to Healthpages.

First of all, local pagans, have a look at: Oakleaf Circle Pagan Resources - Moots in England

Congratulations on your engagement, Pagan Weddings or Handfastings are not currently legally recognised in England, so if you wish to make your union with your partner legally binding then a registry office it will be. You could of course go to Scotland where Handfastings are legally recognised.

Also, I don't believe that you need to be a member of a coven to be Handfast. I know of many pagan couples who have been Handfast by fellow pagans who are also close friends.

In my opinion (as a Solitary Wicca) you do not need to be initiated by a coven to be able to say you follow the Wicca path. I am self-initiated, I dedicated myself to Goddess and God 14 years ago now. I never considered joining a Coven as I like doing my worship my way. If however you wish to find a Coven ask Goddess and God to guide you to them and them to you and always go with your intuition. Meet with a group several times before making a commitment to them and you shouldn't need to pay for the privilege (with the exception of covering costs).

Which ever path you follow, I wish you all the joy and happiness along the way.

Blessed Be

[Crowan]

Originally Posted by Mystacoll

i have recently got engaged and would love a wedding that is a bit more real than singing songs i dont know about a guy who is deabateable of ever existing. Plus Christianity is more or less based on pagan beliefs anyway, and i dont really want a business deal type of wedding in a registry office where we turn up hand over some money scribble our names down and Bob's your uncle...But i believe to actually have a wiccan or pagan wedding i first need to initialise into a group or coven

When my partner and I had our Civil Partnership in 2006, we did the legal bit first, then followed it with a shamanic ceremony, all of which was followed by a party. A great day.

There are very few religions that can perform legal marriages in England, so many people do this.
The Citizens' Advice website says:

The Church of England and the Church in Wales are allowed to register a marriage at the same time as performing the religious ceremony.
Ministers and priests of all other religions can be authorised to register marriages and must have a certificate or licence to do so from the local Superintendent Registrar. For Jewish and Quaker marriages, the authorisation is automatic. For all other religions, if the official performing the ceremony is not authorised, either a Registrar must attend the religious ceremony or the partners will need to have separate religious and civic ceremonies.

I would suggest having a Civil Ceremony, followed by a handfasting. They should be seperate, as registrars have to leave before the religious bit.