Assertiveness Training

[Sun~Rose]

not sure if I am in the correct forum here..

Assertiveness training, has anyone undertaken this recently?..if so what does it consist of?..does it actually work? ...has anyone ever done this course through their local college?..

Think i need some.....
passive i can do..
aggressive i can do
assertiveness..as i understand it eludes me

thanks

Sun~Rose

[ChrisRams]

I teach assertiveness, and have done at FE colleges since 1991. Would you like to continue your thoughts on assertiveness, and what you don't understand about it?

[Sun~Rose]

hi thanks for replying..I seem to struggle in being 'assertive'...it seems if i have something to say that might be deemed confrontational i immediately go into a spin!!..I dont seem to (or have lost maybe through lack of confidence) have this ability to do it..I have very assertive friends who can say the awkward things and it has no affect on their voice/emotions/and thought process..i.e. it doesnt ruin their day..

its a skill i think i need to re-learn.. if it is possible to learn something like this and keep it...

I was asking if anyone had taken courses in a local college for feedback as this would be the place i would aim for as they tend to be cheaper too..I am in the North West..

Is it a high success rate? how do you gauge your clients success?..

thanks..

[meadowsweet]

I'm not overly assertive and I'm so conscious of it that in my last role I did take some Assertiveness training offered through my work. Its all very good in theory, but you have to keep practicing it to stay assertive.

I've found that now I've been out of the work environment for a little while I've reverted back to my self-conscious, shy self and I am struggling to be assertive in my new role.

Assertiveness comes with practice in my view.

Good luck

L&L

[Sun~Rose]

Originally Posted by meadowsweet

I'm not overly assertive and I'm so conscious of it that in my last role I did take some Assertiveness training offered through my work. Its all very good in theory, but you have to keep practicing it to stay assertive.

I've found that now I've been out of the work environment for a little while I've reverted back to my self-conscious, shy self and I am struggling to be assertive in my new role.

Assertiveness comes with practice in my view.

Good luck

L&L

thanks Meadowsweet I understand what you are saying..if and when you go back to the workplace do you think you would need another course or do you think it might come back?

[meadowsweet]

I still have the course notes, so can read through them again but it is a case of being courageous enough to start putting my theory into practice.

[Tigerlily]

Even though you asked if anyone had done a course 'recently', I'm just going to quickly say that I took a course a few years ago and thought it was fantastic. I found it especially useful when it comes to phrasing things. Even though much of it has been forgotten, I've always remembered a few communication techniques which I still use now.

Great example of what I learned was the difference between saying something like 'You MAKE me angry because....' and 'I feel angry because....' And getting someone to stop ranting by using the 'broken record technique' by calmly repeating thier name until they do actually stop and you can get a word in edgeways. Or saying 'Can I make a suggestion?', rather than, 'If I were you I would...' There are too many examples to cite here...

There was also an examination of behaviour types exhibited by people you're dealing with and how to respond to those behaviours.

It was a really good course. Do it!

[Sun~Rose]

Originally Posted by meadowsweet

I still have the course notes, so can read through them again but it is a case of being courageous enough to start putting my theory into practice.

thanks meadowsweet ...

[jeannie]

Originally Posted by Sun~Rose

not sure if I am in the correct forum here..

Assertiveness training, has anyone undertaken this recently?..if so what does it consist of?..does it actually work? ...has anyone ever done this course through their local college?

Sun~Rose

I went on an assertiveness course a 100 years ago and found I was more assertive than the teacher

[fleur]

Originally Posted by jeannie

i went on an assertiveness course a 100 years ago and found i was more assertive than the teacher

is that why you shout ?? (big type font jeannie)

[Sun~Rose]

Originally Posted by jeannie

I went on an assertiveness course a 100 years ago and found I was more assertive than the teacher

haha ...did you get your money back?

[jeannie]

Originally Posted by fleur

is that why you shout ?? (big type font jeannie)

velly funny

Maybe it is because I am a Bull (Taurus)

[fleur]

Originally Posted by jeannie

velly funny

Maybe it is because I am a Bull (Taurus)

Nahh..not all Taureans shout jeannie....some of us can get the message across even if we whisper

[Spiritual Babe]

I become more assertive when I started my current job. I think some times if your not assertive in situations people feel like can treat you like crap. But you need to get the balance right speak your mind but in a non agressive manor, I think people respect you if your up front but theres no need to be nasty. If you have low self esteem I feel it is hard to be assertive, my self esteeem is quite low on occasions and I have had had to work at being assertive, but scince I have people respect me more and do not treat me as they have in the past. Good luck Sun Rose. x